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Hollywood_Guy
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03 Jul 2020, 6:53 pm

I'm not an LGBT-oriented person, but sometimes I am curious about what if or wish that I was. I am a heterosexual genetic male. I think it's just an escapist thought of mine sometimes. I don't know if I'm the only one who somehow feels like that? Is there anybody else that are heterosexual straight or non-Transgender that think about this sometimes?



Bradleigh
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03 Jul 2020, 7:48 pm

I used to think that I was a straight cis male, and I would probably say that a part of me felt a bit jealous that the people seemed to have fun with their identity, but I also found that I felt uncomfortable when confronted by gay things and transgenderism. I went on a limb watching things like Contrapoints, and while not finding myself to be a trans girl I did a lot of self reflection to realize that I am likely non-binary, and more recently that I am pretty sure bisexual. My own thoughts of curiosity but also feeling uncomfortable were both evidence that I was actually repressed.

Two Years ago I would have certainly said that I am kind of like you, although I probably would not have come to the LGBT section because I would have been afraid of.... I am not sure.

Image

That comic is meant to be a joke of how ridiculous it is, but I find it relevant in certain way for understanding things that were always there, things that I used to thought meant nothing. The comic is funny too.

Curious, can you describe what your escapist thought is like? Things don't have to be a thing or nothing, there are spectrums to things like gender and sexuality.


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04 Jul 2020, 7:00 am

I don't know if your looking at it right,I mean to the OP.

I don't feel LGBT is a thing,people are attracted same sex for sure,people are attracted to both sexes for sure,people desire to be another gender for sure and some people don't feel a connection with either gender.And I feel that that is great but it's not an identity,I don't buy into the politics of identity.

I would with what I know of myself say I'm A-spec but I don't identify as asexual it's just a physical inclination or lack thereof.

In other times in history people viewed identity differently than we do,there are no absolutes on what identity is and the modern generation has created fictional identities that have no basis in what real identity is.


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Hollywood_Guy
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04 Jul 2020, 10:04 pm

Bradleigh wrote:
I used to think that I was a straight cis male, and I would probably say that a part of me felt a bit jealous that the people seemed to have fun with their identity, but I also found that I felt uncomfortable when confronted by gay things and transgenderism. I went on a limb watching things like Contrapoints, and while not finding myself to be a trans girl I did a lot of self reflection to realize that I am likely non-binary, and more recently that I am pretty sure bisexual. My own thoughts of curiosity but also feeling uncomfortable were both evidence that I was actually repressed.

Two Years ago I would have certainly said that I am kind of like you, although I probably would not have come to the LGBT section because I would have been afraid of.... I am not sure.

Image

That comic is meant to be a joke of how ridiculous it is, but I find it relevant in certain way for understanding things that were always there, things that I used to thought meant nothing. The comic is funny too.

Curious, can you describe what your escapist thought is like? Things don't have to be a thing or nothing, there are spectrums to things like gender and sexuality.


I love your cute avatar. I am a heterosexual genetic ("cis") male, about those "escapist" thoughts, I have a slight attraction to feminine things, even though my hobbies and other stuff are still prominently fit with my traditional male gender role and expression. And I still don't have an issue with that either. I still like it, in fact. I am not trans though.

I'm personally of the belief there are only two genders and I don't believe in the multiple identities thing.



Bradleigh
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05 Jul 2020, 12:44 am

Hollywood_Guy wrote:
I love your cute avatar. I am a heterosexual genetic ("cis") male, about those "escapist" thoughts, I have a slight attraction to feminine things, even though my hobbies and other stuff are still prominently fit with my traditional male gender role and expression. And I still don't have an issue with that either. I still like it, in fact. I am not trans though.

I'm personally of the belief there are only two genders and I don't believe in the multiple identities thing.


The character in my avatar is from the anime Interspecies Reviewers, the character in question a somewhat feminine appearing but otherwise stated as identifying as male (perhaps to avoid wrong attention), but as an angel are in fact a secret hermaphrodite in a pretty explicit series. I actually chose the character because I like how conflicting elements of masculinity and femininity are with the character.

Liking some feminine things are fine, doesn't mean someone is trans or cis, a person assigned male at birth can even dress like women do and not necessarily be trans. Gender identity is entirely up to the person. I know that I for a long time followed only the two genders thing, that the people talking about things like multiple gender identities were just saying convenient stuff to play out their fetishes and stuff, it kind of took me watching a lot of people, such as trans people both binary and not, for me to open up to the idea a bit. That my experiences were not the same as others, like trans women can suffer from something called dysphoria if they feel or look too masculine, while normal cis men don't occasionally escape into fantasies of maybe being a bit feminine with gender swaps and stuff.

I felt some attraction to cute things, but was mostly comfortable with having masculine clothes and a body, but perhaps not an as strong attachment to that as other people. In fact I would feel more uncomfortable if I was made to be hyper masculine. It was a real hang up that I had where if I was trying to make an insert avatar character in something like Dark Souls I felt uncomfortable making the male character to be a masculine warrior, but had no trouble when I swapped the gender to make it a more female warrior. That all happened while I identified as a cis man, but helped me identify something like I could be envious of tomboys. I found out there are some people that I actually kind of relate to in terms of experience, and these were the people identifying that way because it made them feel validated, I just felt uncomfortable with the idea of "the third gender" because I was insecure about myself.
Image

But none of this is saying that you must be like this, I myself don't really feel comfortable to call myself trans since I feel no real need to transition my body or that I would be in agony if people saw (see) me as male. I can just see that I might actually prefer it more as an enby. I think being curious is cool, see if anything fits, be more confident in yourself regardless. I would love to hear more about people who were curious and are still most certain about their identity.


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cyberdad
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05 Jul 2020, 12:55 am

Bradleigh wrote:
Image
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LMFAO :lol: :lol:

No doubt many feminists cover their son's eyes



kraftiekortie
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05 Jul 2020, 5:27 am

The character in Bradleigh’s avatar appears to me to be most similar to a prepubescent girl.

It doesn’t mean she is not strong. I’ve met some really strong prepubescent girls in the course of my life.



Bradleigh
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05 Jul 2020, 6:17 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
The character in Bradleigh’s avatar appears to me to be most similar to a prepubescent girl.


Perhaps it helps to see him next to the other character's from his series. It as actually a pretty responsible series for one so incredibly sexual. It would be a bit difficult for me to pick out something to properly how very much he is not a young girl, that he very much out measures the other men in a particular way. Watching this censored opening is not suitable for children.



I suppose shorter than the human and elf but taller than the halfling, perhaps the young look comes from the fact that he is feminine to a point of looking girly, but not so much that he has a chest. He always comes across as an adult to the point my avatar is a picture of him working at a bar, and the fact that the main plot of the series has him going to adult establishments. It is not porn!


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kraftiekortie
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05 Jul 2020, 6:47 am

I understand what you are saying.



Hollywood_Guy
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06 Jul 2020, 3:55 pm

cyberdad wrote:
Bradleigh wrote:
Image
.


LMFAO :lol: :lol:

No doubt many feminists cover their son's eyes


Do you think that mom in the pics is a feminist?



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07 Jul 2020, 6:43 am

I think that it's relatively common to have thoughts about having / being a different identity even when you don't directly identify with that identity. For instance, I am a cis woman. My identity is definitely female. However, I have wondered about what it is like to be a trans man or gender-fluid. I have dreams about gender so often that it's no longer unusual to me. Sometimes the focus isn't even on the fact that I'm a guy, rather on what I'm doing (fighting a monster, duelling a witch, haunting somewhere as a ghost etc) and I just happen to be someone else.

There are moments where I wonder if (and how) my approach to potential relationships would vary if I was a straight guy compared to my situation of being a lesbian. Or how I might otherwise present myself differently.

I enjoy fiction because it often offers me a look into different perspectives and lived experiences.


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cyberdad
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08 Jul 2020, 3:08 am

Hollywood_Guy wrote:
cyberdad wrote:
Bradleigh wrote:
Image
.


LMFAO :lol: :lol:

No doubt many feminists cover their son's eyes


Do you think that mom in the pics is a feminist?


Not sure, but my first reaction is that two men kissing in public would cause an automatic negative response in mothers with sons. Advocates whether feminist, BLM or alt-righters tend to have tunnel vision over other groups outside of their own special interests rather than try and see things from other's perspective or through other people's eyes.



kraftiekortie
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08 Jul 2020, 7:00 am

If you’re not gay, you won’t get inspired by seeing two men kiss.



cyberdad
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08 Jul 2020, 10:03 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
If you’re not gay, you won’t get inspired by seeing two men kiss.


I think the point is the mother in the cartoon should teach her son tolerance rather than covering his eyes.



Bradleigh
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08 Jul 2020, 10:33 pm

Pretty sure that the point of the cartoon is meant to make fun of the skewed point of view that the type that act like they want to protect children from seeing gayness, as if seeing two men kiss will suddenly corrupt their child. When that is silly, and at most would just reveal what was already there.


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30 Aug 2020, 8:39 pm

If you wish this, most likely you are but be careful - just like anywhere else, you can be predated upon. Exercise good judgement.