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suzywoo
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17 Aug 2012, 4:06 pm

Hi everyone :)
My son has just been diagnosed with Aspergers' aged 22. The psychologist said he also has OCD and possibly ADHD (he is still assessing him for this)
Initially my son seemed pleased and relieved at the diagnosis but now seems depressed.
His main problem is severe social anxiety to the extent that he won't leave the house alone. He has intrusive thoughts and very vivid 'daydreams' he prefers to be alone. He is mostly ok within the family group but can't function outside of it. The doc said he has true social anxiety as he is genuinely afraid of people especially his own age.
He is on moclobemide for the social anxiety but I'm wondering if there is a more appropriate drug(s).I have read about prozac and OCD. He believes that the intrusive thoughts are causing much of the anxiety so treating the OCD might be key.
I love my son very much and want to help him. I want the AS diagnosis to be a positive step on the road to some kind of progress. How can I best help him?

Sue



questor
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17 Aug 2012, 7:38 pm

Hi Suzywoo! Welcome to Wrong Planet. Check out the many interesting and helpful forums here. Also, get your son to check them out, too. These forums cover a variety of topic categories, and also age groups. There is even a games forum.

As for what you can do to help your son, first, realize that this condition is an incurable neurological condition present from birth. Also, you can't force a "fix" on him. Because it is incurable, there is no "fix." On the plus side, there are treatments and coping methods available. Your son's psych doc can handle the treatments and therpapies, but I can give you some ideas on coping methods that your son can use. Just remember to not be too pushy, as this stresses us out too much, and tends to cause us to shut down or melt down. Here are my coping suggestions:

- Encourage your son to exercise. It generates mood boosting endorphins.

- Have him read funny stories and watch funny shows. Humor also generates endorphins.

- Make sure he eats mostly healthy foods, and enough of it. A healthier diet boosts your immune system and is also good for your mind. Skimping on amount of food leads to depression, crankiness, and being more prone to get sick.

- Have him get enough rest. Being tired leads to depression, crankiness, and being more prone to get sick, too.

- Encourage him to listen to and/or play music. This is mood boosting.

- Encourage him to take courses, either in person, or online. Some of the online ones are free. The in person ones are a good way to meet people.

- Suggest he volunteer with a charity. There are people worse off than we are, who would really appreciate the help. It's also a good way to meet people, and boost your self image and mood.

- If he is not already involved in such, encourage your son to take up a hobby or join a club. These are good ways to meet people who share your interests.

- Encourage him to get involved in community activities. He can attend town meetings, events at local libraries and other local organizations. He can also attend local sporting events, fairs, and art shows. And he can watch or participate in local theater groups. He can also attend events held at local houses of worship. These are all great ways to meet people and boost your self image and mood.

- Employment/or self employment. Great way to meet people, boost self image, put money in your wallet, gain experience. Perhaps you should consider self employment. There are many types to choose from.

>> Lawn mowing/yard work/gardening.
>> House cleaning.
>> Errand/shopping service.
>> Wait for service people, so the home owner/renter doesn't have to take time off from work.
>> House/pet sitting.
>> House chores for the elderly/disabled.
>> Handyman.
>> Tutor.
>> Computer maintenance/repair.
>> Website design.
>> Other website based businesses.
>> Paint houses indoor/outdoor.

There are many other self employment opportunities. Your local libraries will have books with lists and descriptions of them, so have your son look into it. Some of these are jobs he can do with little or no people contact, if it is really too much for him to handle.

Hope this helps, and remember, you are among friends here at WP! :D



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19 Aug 2012, 6:21 pm

Welkome to WP

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TVer
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19 Aug 2012, 8:30 pm

Welcome, I'm an aspie with with OCD as well. I've been on almost every OCD or Bipolar med available. Its tough trying to find the right med(s). I was diagnosed with AS at 15 (I'm 19 now), it was tough for me at first when I was diagnosed (trying to figure out where this new unexpected diagnoses fits into my life).

Best of luck to you and your son, I hope you find the right med for his OCD soon.



suzywoo
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07 Sep 2012, 5:08 pm

Sorry it's been a while but we've been very busy of late.
Thanks for all your thoughts and advice. :D
Louis is currenty withdrawing from moclobemide so we are having a tough time at the moment.
I struggle with the fact that Louis doesn't interact with society as most Aspies seem to, even if they find things difficult at times. Louis says that its all down to his severe social anxiety. I understand that but wish he would push himself out of his comfort zone a bit more.I know its small steps but I can't get him to take that first step!
What really worries me is what will happen when I'm gone? Its not just the financial aspect but who will look after him? That's what scares me the most

Sue



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07 Sep 2012, 5:32 pm

Give him exact dates and times, will help with the anxiety.



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07 Sep 2012, 7:15 pm

Ditto what Stalk said. Having things arranged in routine with familiar places, on a fixed schedule helps. Aspies don't liked the unexpected or nebulous. Start small, like get him to go to one diner or food place and then if he likes it always go there. Once he has that down add a new dimension, like a bookstore and build on it.