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cozysweater
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23 Dec 2012, 12:27 am

I almost never use a person's name when speaking to them. Mainly because I often don't immediately recognize people and could be embarrassingly wrong but also because I have stress that I'll incorrectly recall their name. (like I have their face in my mental file but under the wrong name)
This has actually happened so it's not a neurotic fear. I have some face-blindness issues that can cause problems.

Most of my neighbors greet me by name, which is embarrassing for me because I don't remember any of their names. Recently I discovered that my downstairs neighbor's name is Mike, which is a huge relief because he's very civil and now I can reciprocate. (It's been a year and a half, I probably should have just asked)



FalsettoTesla
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23 Dec 2012, 1:02 am

I use people's names a lot more than most people seem to. I also call a lot of people by their first and last names.

Example conversation (names changed):
Me: John Kelly, what have you been doing lately?
John: Erm. Nothing much.

Me: Sam Smith, I miss John Kelly. Have you spoken to John Kelly recently? We haven't seen him in ages.
Sam: Yeah, me too.

Now that I think about it, that might be a bit weird. My mum calls me by my full name a lot though, so maybe I picked it up from her.



wtfid2
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23 Dec 2012, 2:06 am

i can call or refer to people by name but i find it weird to call them by name in conversation...for instance ''i agree with you erica'' or hey john how are you?


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eric76
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23 Dec 2012, 4:44 am

cozysweater wrote:
I almost never use a person's name when speaking to them. Mainly because I often don't immediately recognize people and could be embarrassingly wrong but also because I have stress that I'll incorrectly recall their name.


I've known most of my neighbors (or their parents or grandparents) since I was very young. I live in a small community that has very little turnover. This makes it pretty easy for me to know most of my neighbors.

The only neighbors I have who had no ties to the community before moving into it is the local preacher, a local Mennonite family who I've never even seen as far as I know, a farmworker family who works for a local family who has been here for 70 or 80 years, and some famous rodeo cowboy who lives on the edge of the community and who I've never seen but have heard and read the name many, many times. At least I think he still lives here.

Of everyone who currently lives in the community, my family has been here the longest.



howzat
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23 Dec 2012, 4:07 pm

Most of the time i call people by they names but sometimes i would call them by they nicknames instead.



Taybot97
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23 Dec 2012, 7:02 pm

The only time I use someone's name is if I need their attention (and just talking in their direction won't work) and don't have an alternative name they will respond to. I have some nicknames I call people and imagine with using those but I just don't seem to like people's normal names.



abyssquick
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24 Dec 2012, 1:03 am

I don't like using names, either. It's much like my aversion to eye contact.



Davidlorenzo41
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24 Dec 2012, 1:08 pm

ColdEyesWarmHeart wrote:
I don't tend to use people's names when talking to them. Thought it was just my own odd quirk!


Same here. I don't know why I avoid using names, but I do. I only use the name when absolutely necessary. It's not that I don't remember names, it's more about faces (prosopagnosia) and making the connection. Especially if I have to meet and get to know a lot of people in a short amount of time, it takes me a long time to process the input. For example, I'm a teacher, and it usually takes me a month or two to learn all my students names.