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Timid Espeon
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27 Jun 2020, 12:43 pm

I have trouble with phonecalls. I get anxious when people don't pick up the phone, voice mail is too scary to me. I feel like I would mess it up, and embarrass myself. Is there any good ways to reduce anxiety?



jimmy m
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27 Jun 2020, 8:09 pm

Timid Espeon wrote:
I have trouble with phonecalls. I get anxious when people don't pick up the phone, voice mail is too scary to me. I feel like I would mess it up, and embarrass myself. Is there any good ways to reduce anxiety?


I don't know if I can provide any help. Generally I keep my phone conversations short, direct and to-the-point. If it is going to be a long conversation, I put the conversation together before it happens. I write down on paper all the points I need to accomplish in the conversation. I make sure I have any materials at my fingertips before I make the call.

Now I am old and in general, the younger generations has innovated. So when I watch my daughter, she will go into a store and take a photo of something she wants to buy. She then calls her mother on the same phone and shows it to her or sends it to her sister for approval. The camera on cell phones have become a new tool in conversations. Go into a store and use your phone to generate a digital coupon. Scan a bar code. Select the best color for paint for the kitchen remodel over the phone. So people today are really integrating voice and visuals in their conversations and they are doing this quite seamlessly.

I find voice mail to be quite simple. Generally I say my name and my phone number and ask them to call me back. Sometimes but not always, I will also add the purpose of the call. I like to talk to people on the phone directly, not by leaving messages because I need to know they received my message and didn't delete it off-hand. I need feedback.


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Zakatar
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29 Jun 2020, 6:54 am

I much prefer texting to talking on the phone as I like having time to think about what I’m saying, which talking on the phone (or in person, though for some reason I find that less daunting) does not afford.


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Stardust_Dragonfly
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29 Jun 2020, 7:10 am

I don't like the phone either! As for voicemails, if it's an important call maybe have a 'script' wrote down before the call for you to read? If they do answer maybe have a list of the things you want to talk about?



LunaticCentruroides
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29 Jun 2020, 7:53 pm

I never talk on the voicemail. If the voicemail comes, I'm avoiding it and call later again.
What I can suggest for talking on the phone, is "the more you do, the easier it gets". Start with doing easy phonecalls(like appointments) and don't hesitate! Until you reach a point you can do them without anxiety.

There is another trick my coach I had four years ago suggested me.. That was at the time I trained seriously to make important phonecalls: So you write down on a piece of paper the exact words you wanna say. So all you have to do is to read your text down. (But try to sound natural) And depending on what question they may ask, you write down the right answers as well, so you're not lost if some questions gonna come.

You could actually use the same technique for a voicemail. It would be even easier on vm since there is no one on the other line.



Deanne
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01 Jul 2020, 1:04 pm

I hate phones. I stick to texting as much as I can. I call my parents every Sunday evening and am always glad when it's over.



Kitty4670
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10 Jul 2020, 1:58 am

I don’t like talking on the phone, people can talk too fast for me or I lose interest in the conversation. I don’t talk on the phone too much, I only talk to my grandmother on the phone. I sometimes have to call the SSI :skull: :cry: :cry: When I’m talking to my grandmother on the phone, I always cut her off, I talk when she still talking, I don’t know why, I get bored too. I need to call my grandmother, i keep forgetting or I don’t feel like talking on the phone.


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Mr Reynholm
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28 Jul 2020, 6:44 pm

I hate talking on the phone. I've got to psych myself up to actually make a phone call.



funeralxempire
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31 Jul 2020, 9:14 pm

Wow, I didn't expect this to be so common. Speaking on the phone makes me incredibly anxious, I don't usually leave voice mails and my anxiety over using the phone has often had negative impacts on my well-being (missed jobs, friendships, etc).


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fegejej905
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10 Aug 2020, 2:19 pm

I really like to talk with my friends for a hour on phone