Do You Get Treated Like You Are A Child?

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StarTrekker
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04 Jul 2020, 4:35 pm

Yes, I'm 27 and look like I'm 14 (literally been told this by people whom I've asked to guess my age). My parents still treat me like a little kid who needs help with everything, but don't treat my younger sister that way. People generally, when being introduced to me, adopt that slow, high pitched voice when talking to me, either because they assume I'm actually or a child or because my mom has told them I have autism (which she does with irritating frequency). I don't mind it so much, but sometimes it can feel undignified. A couple of years ago at a Thanksgiving party, I met a ten-year-old who wanted to play with me, and it came out later that she assumed I was the same age she was.


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Lost_dragon
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04 Jul 2020, 6:29 pm

Not usually. I think people tend to assume that I know what I'm doing more than I actually do. :lol:

There are a few exceptions. When I work with clients, as a part of my university course, sometimes I get talked down to. Often by someone that complains that they could do my subject area quicker than me and some off-hand remark about my generation. I remember one client that found it silly that planning and story-boarding a short film would take at least a day. "Well, if I was doing it then it would only take me thirty minutes! That's what I don't understand about you college kids, what are they teaching you?"

If I were to make a very rough draft, then perhaps thirty minutes would suffice, but I have to account for changes that I might want to make in the process in case plans are altered. Plus, I'll want to map out a few directions before I narrow down the main direction of the film. If you only need thirty minutes to do so, well then sir that's rather impressive and if that's the case then I'm not entirely sure what you need me for.

People have told me that I'm child-like in a whimsical sense, for enjoying children's fantasy and being more on the creative side, but that I also come across as mature. That my inner-child must be thriving. I have a baby face though, so sometimes people aren't sure about my age. However, apparently I come across as mature and responsible through how I speak and the overall way I present myself. Guesses about my age can vary from fifteen up to twenty-nine.

I've even had some people complain that I need to grow back down and live my life a bit more. That I'm way too cynical for someone so young.


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RadioDog
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04 Jul 2020, 8:08 pm

At one job I worked (as a grunt worker in working for a social services company) professionals who should know better (like social workers, doctors, etc) treated me as an odd but highly intelligent person (which about sums me up) - until they learned I had an ASD diagnosis, at which point they began using simpler words, speaking more slowly, and with goofy smiles plastered on their faces as if I had a low IQ. It was really irritating as even when I confronted them on it, they just smiled and nodded but didn't change.



livingwithautism
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17 Jul 2020, 3:19 pm

StarTrekker wrote:
Yes, I'm 27 and look like I'm 14 (literally been told this by people whom I've asked to guess my age). My parents still treat me like a little kid who needs help with everything, but don't treat my younger sister that way. People generally, when being introduced to me, adopt that slow, high pitched voice when talking to me, either because they assume I'm actually or a child or because my mom has told them I have autism (which she does with irritating frequency). I don't mind it so much, but sometimes it can feel undignified. A couple of years ago at a Thanksgiving party, I met a ten-year-old who wanted to play with me, and it came out later that she assumed I was the same age she was.


People use that voice on me too.



Pieplup
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17 Jul 2020, 4:34 pm

Mountain Goat wrote:
I am not saying this has happened to me today, but sometimes in the past I have. Is it common? I find it strange as I am intelligent enough.

Yes but I geuss i'm still a minor so.


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usagibryan
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17 Jul 2020, 4:59 pm

By my family, yes, or at least that's my perception. I've always had this nagging sense they all think I'm slow and they talk to me like I'm slow or need special treatment. I can't tell if it's in my head or not. Sometimes when they are talking and I try to say something they get quiet so they can let me get a word in but that makes me uncomfortable, and any time we are doing anything like moving furniture it feels like they are ordering me around, like I don't know what I'm doing. I had a panic attack recently and ended up in the hospital for it, and I could tell everyone knew because they all had this "tone" when the spoke to me afterwards, that was humiliating.

I get treated like I'm stupid by my friends, or at least that's what it feels like, like they are patronizing me. I'm also very curious by nature and ask lots of questions, which I think other people interpret as being dumb. I was so desperate for friends and to find people as nerdy as me and now that I've found them I don't feel as smart as them. They are really into board games but games that are long and complicated with lots of rules and strategy involved, I can barely focus when they go over the rules (I always zone out when things are explained to me, I can't help it, I could never sit through lectures) and they can tell, they get annoyed and think I'm not interested or being rude. My best friend is always trying to "fix" me and lecture me about every day functional adult life things and it has caused a rift between us, and to be fair I'm s**t at adulting but I can't stand being patronized or told what to do.