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Crystal1414
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26 Jul 2021, 10:12 pm

Today my sister and I got in a fight. She told me I was needy and to leave her alone and to stop talking about my religious stuff.

I told my sister I was leaving but she didn't believe me. She went to have a shower. I went into my room and packed my backpack with clothes and food. Then I left. I felt really good about leaving. I didn't have to deal with her at that moment. Then people started staring at me. I don't know why they were. Someone even asked if I was lost. I was walking with a purpose though. I didn't respond to that. I hate talking.

I walked to a park about 20 minutes away from my house. I fell asleep there. I woke up feeling very out of it. I felt amazing though. Then someone I dont know asked me if I was ok. I said I was. They started asking me more questions and I felt really anxious and I had a shutdown. I couldn't talk or move properly. I had to give them my sisters contact information. I even peed myself. My moods fluctuate a lot. Today I felt amazing and anxious and upset. My sister is mad at me now because she got in trouble.



funeralxempire
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26 Jul 2021, 10:39 pm

I'm glad you're safe and secure now.

Something about the way you planned it both explains why it wouldn't succeed as well as why you probably shouldn't.

How long did you plan for when packing clothes and food?
And then what?

It wasn't a long term enough plan to be achievable. This plays into why your folks are controlling even if they still could do more to respect your dignity.

I wish your sister and interacting with her didn't make things so unbearable but I really hope that this doesn't become a coping mechanism because of the potential for bad outcomes.


_________________
the problem with capitalism is that eventually you run out of other people's resources and cheap labour to exploit
戦争ではなく戦争と戦う


Crystal1414
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Joined: 25 Aug 2020
Posts: 187
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27 Jul 2021, 10:27 am

funeralxempire wrote:
I'm glad you're safe and secure now.

Something about the way you planned it both explains why it wouldn't succeed as well as why you probably shouldn't.

How long did you plan for when packing clothes and food?
And then what?

It wasn't a long term enough plan to be achievable. This plays into why your folks are controlling even if they still could do more to respect your dignity.

I wish your sister and interacting with her didn't make things so unbearable but I really hope that this doesn't become a coping mechanism because of the potential for bad outcomes.


Yeah. Im glad I'm safe too. I packed enough for a few days. I wasn't sure what to pack for food though. I did pack a lot of water and fruit as well as candy. Yeah. I guess I wasn't thinking about the long term stuff. I guess I was just planning on getting a short break. I don't think I will do it again because I got a long lecture about safety. I do carry a notebook with contact information though.



Summer_Twilight
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27 Jul 2021, 11:24 am

Crystal1414 wrote:
Today my sister and I got in a fight. She told me I was needy and to leave her alone and to stop talking about my religious stuff.

I told my sister I was leaving but she didn't believe me. She went to have a shower. I went into my room and packed my backpack with clothes and food. Then I left. I felt really good about leaving. I didn't have to deal with her at that moment. Then people started staring at me. I don't know why they were. Someone even asked if I was lost. I was walking with a purpose though. I didn't respond to that. I hate talking.

I walked to a park about 20 minutes away from my house. I fell asleep there. I woke up feeling very out of it. I felt amazing though. Then someone I dont know asked me if I was ok. I said I was. They started asking me more questions and I felt really anxious and I had a shutdown. I couldn't talk or move properly. I had to give them my sisters contact information. I even peed myself. My moods fluctuate a lot. Today I felt amazing and anxious and upset. My sister is mad at me now because she got in trouble.


The problem is that your sister doesn't treat you right because she's insecure and doesn't understand and nor does she want to. In fact, I just heard something about rejection. If your sister doesn't want anything to do with you, don't keep trying. In fact, you don't need to explain yourself with her. It's probably better to enjoy the things you like and keep to yourself.

As for running away, have you considered looking for a different living situation? If not, maybe find a shared interest group?



funeralxempire
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27 Jul 2021, 11:33 am

Crystal1414 wrote:
funeralxempire wrote:
I'm glad you're safe and secure now.

Something about the way you planned it both explains why it wouldn't succeed as well as why you probably shouldn't.

How long did you plan for when packing clothes and food?
And then what?

It wasn't a long term enough plan to be achievable. This plays into why your folks are controlling even if they still could do more to respect your dignity.

I wish your sister and interacting with her didn't make things so unbearable but I really hope that this doesn't become a coping mechanism because of the potential for bad outcomes.


Yeah. Im glad I'm safe too. I packed enough for a few days. I wasn't sure what to pack for food though. I did pack a lot of water and fruit as well as candy. Yeah. I guess I wasn't thinking about the long term stuff. I guess I was just planning on getting a short break. I don't think I will do it again because I got a long lecture about safety. I do carry a notebook with contact information though.


That's a good idea.

Is there anywhere in your home you can go to when things get like that?


_________________
the problem with capitalism is that eventually you run out of other people's resources and cheap labour to exploit
戦争ではなく戦争と戦う


Crystal1414
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Joined: 25 Aug 2020
Posts: 187
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27 Jul 2021, 10:25 pm

Summer_Twilight wrote:
Crystal1414 wrote:
Today my sister and I got in a fight. She told me I was needy and to leave her alone and to stop talking about my religious stuff.

I told my sister I was leaving but she didn't believe me. She went to have a shower. I went into my room and packed my backpack with clothes and food. Then I left. I felt really good about leaving. I didn't have to deal with her at that moment. Then people started staring at me. I don't know why they were. Someone even asked if I was lost. I was walking with a purpose though. I didn't respond to that. I hate talking.

I walked to a park about 20 minutes away from my house. I fell asleep there. I woke up feeling very out of it. I felt amazing though. Then someone I dont know asked me if I was ok. I said I was. They started asking me more questions and I felt really anxious and I had a shutdown. I couldn't talk or move properly. I had to give them my sisters contact information. I even peed myself. My moods fluctuate a lot. Today I felt amazing and anxious and upset. My sister is mad at me now because she got in trouble.


The problem is that your sister doesn't treat you right because she's insecure and doesn't understand and nor does she want to. In fact, I just heard something about rejection. If your sister doesn't want anything to do with you, don't keep trying. In fact, you don't need to explain yourself with her. It's probably better to enjoy the things you like and keep to yourself.

As for running away, have you considered looking for a different living situation? If not, maybe find a shared interest group?


I am starting to realize that. I think she is embarrassed by me. It just hurts that she is rejecting me and yet she has friends who also struggle with mental health. But apparently they dont make it everyone else's problem. Yeah, I have been enjoying the things I like but right now I feel like I need to share my beliefs with her. However she thinks Im "Crazy".



Crystal1414
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Joined: 25 Aug 2020
Posts: 187
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27 Jul 2021, 10:26 pm

funeralxempire wrote:
Crystal1414 wrote:
funeralxempire wrote:
I'm glad you're safe and secure now.

Something about the way you planned it both explains why it wouldn't succeed as well as why you probably shouldn't.

How long did you plan for when packing clothes and food?
And then what?

It wasn't a long term enough plan to be achievable. This plays into why your folks are controlling even if they still could do more to respect your dignity.

I wish your sister and interacting with her didn't make things so unbearable but I really hope that this doesn't become a coping mechanism because of the potential for bad outcomes.


Yeah. Im glad I'm safe too. I packed enough for a few days. I wasn't sure what to pack for food though. I did pack a lot of water and fruit as well as candy. Yeah. I guess I wasn't thinking about the long term stuff. I guess I was just planning on getting a short break. I don't think I will do it again because I got a long lecture about safety. I do carry a notebook with contact information though.


That's a good idea.

Is there anywhere in your home you can go to when things get like that?



Yeah. I always carry it. I go in my closet when things get bad.



funeralxempire
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27 Jul 2021, 10:59 pm

Crystal1414 wrote:
It just hurts that she is rejecting me and yet she has friends who also struggle with mental health. But apparently they dont make it everyone else's problem. Yeah, I have been enjoying the things I like but right now I feel like I need to share my beliefs with her. However she thinks Im "Crazy".


It's also a matter of extent. Their issues might be easier to understand in terms of extent. It doesn't make it right or fair for her to treat you like a burden, but at the same she's a teenager acting like a teenager and she'll probably reconsider her attitude later.

Crystal1414 wrote:
I go in my closet when things get bad.


I'm glad you've got that option.
Mine's full. :oops:


_________________
the problem with capitalism is that eventually you run out of other people's resources and cheap labour to exploit
戦争ではなく戦争と戦う


Crystal1414
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Joined: 25 Aug 2020
Posts: 187
Location: Canada

28 Jul 2021, 6:44 am

funeralxempire wrote:
Crystal1414 wrote:
It just hurts that she is rejecting me and yet she has friends who also struggle with mental health. But apparently they dont make it everyone else's problem. Yeah, I have been enjoying the things I like but right now I feel like I need to share my beliefs with her. However she thinks Im "Crazy".


It's also a matter of extent. Their issues might be easier to understand in terms of extent. It doesn't make it right or fair for her to treat you like a burden, but at the same she's a teenager acting like a teenager and she'll probably reconsider her attitude later.

Crystal1414 wrote:
I go in my closet when things get bad.


I'm glad you've got that option.
Mine's full. :oops:


Yeah. I think that is what it is. Her friend has depression and anxiety. I understand that it is not easy to deal with. My sister helps her friend during bad times but if Im having a bad day she leaves the house to hang out with her friends. I dont know how to respond to that. She says Im much more awkward to be around than her friends when I ask if we can go places together. She says that she doesn't want to do all the talking for me. She's 16 going on 17. She is a bit confusing to be honest. I hope she changes her attitude. I sort of understand though. I guess I am a lot to handle. Everyone seems to say it.

I love my closet. Its pretty full though but there is just enough room for me to sleep in there.