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Joined: 18 Dec 2016
Age: 18
Gender: Female
Posts: 619
Location: Southern California

07 May 2021, 8:49 am

Out only to close friends and my sister. The rest of my family would hate me forever if I said I was bi.

AQ Score: 20

Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 93 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 125 of 200
You seem to have both neurodiverse and neurotypical traits

Back after a long hiatus. May not be as active, though.


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Joined: 29 Oct 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 7,735
Location: ᜆᜄᜎᜓᜄ᜔

09 May 2021, 7:15 pm

Not a closet. Just not advertising it.
And I usually don't care. :lol:

But sometimes I just had to spell out that I'm never 'interested'. In anyone. At all.

Also everyone can see I don't exactly act, think or even feel and move like any feminine woman even if I look like one.
Yet there are rare instances that I have to clear out the fact that I also don't want anything to being a man. :P

Gained Number Post Count (1).
Lose Time (n).

Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

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Joined: 16 May 2021
Age: 29
Posts: 54
Location: Down in Clowntown

16 May 2021, 11:10 am

I've been away from home for years now, so the friends I have made since then in different states know I am trans. My parents have an idea but choose to ignore it, which makes me doubt my growth even though I've been on HRT for almost 4 years. It really hurt when I told my mom years ago and she would consistently tell me how mistaken I am, so I just don't share anything about my personal life with her or my dad. Even my twin brother doesn't believe me or chooses to ignore it too. I rarely visit them because I dread their responses to my obvious physical changes. It's always been a challenge to advocate for myself and I don't argue. There's a lot to be said for chosen family, which queers end up finding when denied support from biological family. Most of my friends are trans at this point and it makes things a lot easier in that I don't have to teach people who don't understand my existence. I don't ever talk about it at work, so no one knows. I'm sure my boss does because he's handled my paperwork which still has my deadname on it. But he's cool and has never mentioned it to me or my coworkers which I greatly appreciate. Most of my co-workers are cis-het men and I am grateful to not have to have a conversation about it with them. Not saying there's anything wrong with being cis-het of course, its just these guys in particular uphold a specific and mainstream idea of masculinity that is harmful. I identify as asexual and kinky at this point in my life and don't advertise either. I'm a rather private person and I don't feel like I am missing out much by not sharing. It just gets uncomfortable when someone expresses a sexual interest in me.

Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

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Joined: 30 Mar 2019
Gender: Female
Posts: 28
Location: New Mexico

30 May 2021, 5:01 pm

I’m very out. When I grew up in the 60s/70s, there was little to no info available about transgender people. When puberty hit I learned I was almost exclusively attracted to men, and thus concluded that I was a gay man. Started coming out as gay at 17 and basically blew the doors off my closet by the age of 21. Those were the early days of the HIV/AIDS pandemic, and marching in the streets was something many of us did. I was out, loud & proud for decades. Then, in my fifties I finally had the opportunity to work through some very old trauma and in the process discovered that I’m actually a trans woman. In 2017 I decided to transition.

I figure everyone knows whenever I step out of my house, or when I speak. That being the case, having coming out conversations with others just doesn’t feel necessary. If someone doesn’t know I’m trans, they’re not paying any attention.

I am not out to many as an autistic, at least not yet. I have told the two people I’m closest to, and one of them said, “Oh. That actually makes a lot of sense.” My therapist also knows, since she referred me for the assessment.

"Who in the world am I?” Ah, that’s the great puzzle.”
Alice in Wonderland

AQ score: 36
Diagnosed May 2021: ASD Level 1 ( i.e. Aspergers), requiring support


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Joined: 27 Oct 2014
Age: 36
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 12,495
Location: I'm right here

30 May 2021, 5:07 pm

How out can I be? I'm gynephilic and masculine-presenting so unless I say something explicit I expect to be considered cis-het and male.

Ultimately though, if I'm being 100% honest with myself a neutral identity is closer to how I perceive myself.

politics is dumb but very important

Sea Gull
Sea Gull

Joined: 2 Apr 2017
Age: 45
Gender: Male
Posts: 209
Location: Kirkland, WA

17 Jun 2021, 11:40 am

Completely out of any closet. Gut wrenching to read many of the previous entries. Be loved!

Go Vegan!


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Joined: 22 Jul 2015
Gender: Female
Posts: 18,664
Location: United States

17 Jun 2021, 8:53 pm

I'm out to my family, good friends, and therapist. I haven't told my psychiatrist or case manager as I don't think they'd approve. Also been avoiding telling my neighbors. When I meet someone new it's not the first thing I tell them but if they are going to stick around I've come to realize it's better to just be honest in most cases.