Does anyone here identify as nonbinary?

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TenMinutes
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01 Mar 2021, 4:20 pm

Bradleigh wrote:
TenMinutes wrote:
Bradleigh wrote:
@ TenMinutes

I was accepted into one on Facebook by just saying my identity and wanting to understand more. Maybe they just did not get around to it yet.


Yeah, that must be it. It's only been four days.


The group I joined is called Non-Binary Gender Pride, I do remember the group requiring to submit why they want to join it. Are you able to say what you wrote?


That's the one that never acknowledged my request to join. There is an associated "social space" group, and I noticed in that one they request you join the social space before the gender pride one, so that's what I did.

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As is, I only rarely go on, I am far too shy for a lot of social networking, mostly a way to feel some affirmation by seeing other people.


I posted pictures and my story and got hundreds of reactions and comments. That's pretty affirming, too.



mr_bigmouth_502
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07 Mar 2021, 6:55 am

I'd say I do. I'm really not sure what "flavor" of nonbinary I am, but I fall somewhere under that umbrella. I don't mind blending in as a garden variety bisexual guy, but it doesn't really tell the whole story.

It'd be nice if WP let us change and customize the listed gender in our profiles.

Also, this is my 7000th post!


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Ferrous
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08 Mar 2021, 6:58 am

I've been thinking I might be non-binary or something like that for years now, and the more I think about it, the more right it seems. I'm not really good at articulating it, but I just... don't feel male or female. I cringe when people talk about masculinity, and I'm not exactly feminine either. I've actually fantasised quite a lot about looking really androgynous.

However, I'm really hesitant to talk about this with people I know IRL. I just... don't think most of the people I know would understand.



cberg
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09 Mar 2021, 8:55 am

Not exactly but then I'm also not sure what else I would rationally say about me.


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WerewolfPoet
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01 Apr 2021, 9:25 am

Another enby here. :)

I don't usually add sublabels to my nonbinary-ness, but I think the closest description would be "androgyne"; my gender definitely has both feminine and masculine elements to it, and I'm comfortable being perceived as either a woman or a man (...though I almost never get perceived as the latter because I'm small with soft features, I have a love of florals, and I have, uh, certain assets), but I'm not exactly a woman or a man, and I'd prefer to be seen as androgynous (though I know that most people have the natural tendency to put people in one box or the other).


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Mona Pereth
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02 Apr 2021, 1:23 pm

A bit of relevant history: The main founder of the autistic rights movement, Jim Sinclair, was intersex, hence also nonbinary.


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funeralxempire
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02 Apr 2021, 1:45 pm

Mona Pereth wrote:
A bit of relevant history: The main founder of the autistic rights movement, Jim Sinclair, was intersex, hence also nonbinary.


Lots of intersex people are binary, the two don't always follow.


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Lost_dragon
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30 Apr 2021, 8:15 pm

How do you feel about cis people using they as a pronoun for themselves? I go by she / her but I'm also fine with they. However, I don't usually say that because it tends to open up a bunch of questions. I feel like how much my gender is a part of my identity varies. How I felt about my chest really varied a lot during puberty. Some days I wanted it to be flat, other days I wanted my chest to be bigger. Now I'm comfortable with my chest and no longer desire for them to be detachable. I think I feel most comfortable in semi-fitted T-shirts and unbuttoned baggy shirts over them. Baggy shirts downplay my shoulders, which I've been made to feel insecure about, and semi-fitted T-shirts give me some shape. I like my hair the most when it's in a bob.

Sometimes I wish I could be feminine in the way men are, as a form of self-expression rather than fulfilling an expectation. I do like men's fashion that is described as feminine but it's still fairly androgynous. A part of me wants to buy men's shirts and wear black nail polish. My identity is female yet I'm also just a brain in a vessel that happens to be female and if you wanna call me they that's fine.


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Bradleigh
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30 Apr 2021, 9:00 pm

My understanding is that pronouns don't have to be a one to one to gender identity, especially with gender being complicated it can be better to just trust someone to know what feels right. Although I would honestly be a bit jealous that a cis person can say they might like "they", since I don't really correct anyone over my own because being chicken.


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OutsideView
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01 May 2021, 6:10 am

Lost_dragon wrote:
How do you feel about cis people using they as a pronoun for themselves? I go by she / her but I'm also fine with they. However, I don't usually say that because it tends to open up a bunch of questions. I feel like how much my gender is a part of my identity varies. How I felt about my chest really varied a lot during puberty. Some days I wanted it to be flat, other days I wanted my chest to be bigger. Now I'm comfortable with my chest and no longer desire for them to be detachable. I think I feel most comfortable in semi-fitted T-shirts and unbuttoned baggy shirts over them. Baggy shirts downplay my shoulders, which I've been made to feel insecure about, and semi-fitted T-shirts give me some shape. I like my hair the most when it's in a bob.

Sometimes I wish I could be feminine in the way men are, as a form of self-expression rather than fulfilling an expectation. I do like men's fashion that is described as feminine but it's still fairly androgynous. A part of me wants to buy men's shirts and wear black nail polish. My identity is female yet I'm also just a brain in a vessel that happens to be female and if you wanna call me they that's fine.

Are you me? 8O

Other than a problem with shoulders and wanting hair in a bob that's exactly how I feel. I wouldn't be bothered by cis people using "they" for themselves. I could never decide if I was female or non-binary, now I'm wondering about agender. Sometimes it seems important, sometimes completely irrelevant.


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NaturalEntity
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02 May 2021, 11:57 am

I think cis people using they is fine. Pronouns do not equal gender after all.


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Bradleigh
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05 Jun 2021, 5:58 pm

I had a rather interesting experience recently where I had to correct my family from misgendering a likely trans man they did not like, which up to and including words like "shemale" and "it". I had to get involved and tell them that they go by what a person identifies as, and if they are confused use "they", and is a perfectly normal way to refer to an individual. Kind of made me realise that there was a real reason I never really pushed them about my own identity as an enby, and perhaps I should when I get told both that they will accept me for my identity, but will still apparently only see me as a son or brother rather than a non-binary option.


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Persephone29
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09 Jun 2021, 10:26 pm

I am in the body of a female. I don't feel very girly or boyish. I don't pay much attention to physical states. I pay attention to things that challenge my brain. So, I don't really know.


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kraftiekortie
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10 Jun 2021, 7:49 am

I still feel boyish/manly.

And I'm pretty sure I would still feel boyish/manly even if I grew up with gender and sex de-emphasized.



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11 Jun 2021, 8:43 am

I’m a masculine woman who often comes across as androgynous, and sometimes gets called sir. I don’t put much thought into it anymore and I just go about life being me. I don’t consider myself non-binary but my partner has described me as “neither and both at the same time.” I think I’m just confusing. I go by she by people who know me, or know my birth sex. That’s fine with me as long as people don’t assume that I must be a certain way because I’m female. Social constructs make gender confusing because of what society wants each gender to be, when in reality it’s just the way your body is made and the rest is all dependent on the person.



kraftiekortie
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11 Jun 2021, 1:27 pm

Truly, I don't know too many purely "masculine" men or purely "feminine" women."

I grew up with "tomboys," and they were accepted as girls, but were acknowledged to be tomboyish. They sometimes liked to hang out with guys more than they liked hanging out with other girls.

I'm a mostly "masculine" man----but I have some feminine interests, too. I come across as a man---but not a "macho man," by any means.

I was called "metrosexual" by somebody. I had to look that up. I don't agree that I come across as being "metrosexual."