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Mountain Goat
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22 May 2019, 2:29 pm

I agree. Ask him if you want to be more then friends, and if not tell him it is OK and totally fine to be just friends. And GOOD LUCK!



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22 May 2019, 2:40 pm

jimmy m wrote:
I have learned over the years to never reject an opportunity out of hand. This is an opportunity. The basic simple question to ask him is, "Do you wish us to be more than friends."
Yes if he refuses then you can start trying to get over him.

EDIT: maybe you can just ask him for a proper date, one-on-one without any third party, to give you time to talk. If he accepts the invitation, then you're probably good.


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angelofdarkness
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22 May 2019, 6:45 pm

MaxE wrote:
jimmy m wrote:
I have learned over the years to never reject an opportunity out of hand. This is an opportunity. The basic simple question to ask him is, "Do you wish us to be more than friends."
Yes if he refuses then you can start trying to get over him.

EDIT: maybe you can just ask him for a proper date, one-on-one without any third party, to give you time to talk. If he accepts the invitation, then you're probably good.


He acts awkward to even talk to at work, so i cant imagine he'd react well to that


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blackicmenace
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22 May 2019, 7:08 pm

angelofdarkness wrote:
MaxE wrote:
jimmy m wrote:
I have learned over the years to never reject an opportunity out of hand. This is an opportunity. The basic simple question to ask him is, "Do you wish us to be more than friends."
Yes if he refuses then you can start trying to get over him.

EDIT: maybe you can just ask him for a proper date, one-on-one without any third party, to give you time to talk. If he accepts the invitation, then you're probably good.


He acts awkward to even talk to at work, so i cant imagine he'd react well to that

Yup, sounds like he likes you and doesn't know how to act around you. Does he have low self esteem?


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angelofdarkness
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22 May 2019, 8:16 pm

blackicmenace wrote:
angelofdarkness wrote:
MaxE wrote:
jimmy m wrote:
I have learned over the years to never reject an opportunity out of hand. This is an opportunity. The basic simple question to ask him is, "Do you wish us to be more than friends."
Yes if he refuses then you can start trying to get over him.

EDIT: maybe you can just ask him for a proper date, one-on-one without any third party, to give you time to talk. If he accepts the invitation, then you're probably good.


He acts awkward to even talk to at work, so i cant imagine he'd react well to that


Yes i know for a fact he does, I've heard him put himslef down, but he apparently only views me as a friend, he claimed when my friend asked. It jsut seems awkward how hes acting, over just someone liking him, if he won't "talk" to me like he claimed he wanted to like my friend said he wanted to and i get no chance at work


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blackicmenace
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22 May 2019, 8:28 pm

Perhaps he wasn't completely honest with your friend, maybe he was, only he knows. I know from personal experience that low self esteem and feeling unworthy of those you like can create huge issues. His insecurities are probably getting the best of him. You may need to take things slowly and convince him you really do like him if he has self loathing like I do. It's hard to believe someone can like you when you hate yourself.


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rdos
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24 May 2019, 10:53 am

Fnord wrote:
Yeah! Stop the drama, quit playing games, and go talk to him!

:roll:


On the contrary. This could end up as a real interesting game. At least if he acts this way because he is neurodiverse.



rdos
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24 May 2019, 10:59 am

angelofdarkness wrote:
blackicmenace wrote:
angelofdarkness wrote:
MaxE wrote:
jimmy m wrote:
I have learned over the years to never reject an opportunity out of hand. This is an opportunity. The basic simple question to ask him is, "Do you wish us to be more than friends."
Yes if he refuses then you can start trying to get over him.

EDIT: maybe you can just ask him for a proper date, one-on-one without any third party, to give you time to talk. If he accepts the invitation, then you're probably good.


He acts awkward to even talk to at work, so i cant imagine he'd react well to that


Yes i know for a fact he does, I've heard him put himslef down, but he apparently only views me as a friend, he claimed when my friend asked. It jsut seems awkward how hes acting, over just someone liking him, if he won't "talk" to me like he claimed he wanted to like my friend said he wanted to and i get no chance at work


I wouldn't trust his friends to provide that kind of information. I would never tell anybody if I was romantically interested in a girl. That's information the girl herself would need to interpret from me. If she can't we simply are not compatible enough.



rdos
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24 May 2019, 11:05 am

blackicmenace wrote:
He sounds a lot like me when I was young. Very immature, I knew I liked them, but didn't have a clue how to act on all those emotions. He is probably afraid to make a misstep and ruin things between you both. Perhaps you should take the first step like Jimmy has suggested.


I think that is breaking the rules of the game, and so a bad idea.



blackicmenace
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24 May 2019, 1:54 pm

rdos wrote:
blackicmenace wrote:
He sounds a lot like me when I was young. Very immature, I knew I liked them, but didn't have a clue how to act on all those emotions. He is probably afraid to make a misstep and ruin things between you both. Perhaps you should take the first step like Jimmy has suggested.


I think that is breaking the rules of the game, and so a bad idea.

It took a woman that was capable of convincing me I was worthy of her affection. Assuming his issues are stemming from self loathing, it may be true for him as well. Just speculation of course.


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rdos
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24 May 2019, 2:29 pm

blackicmenace wrote:
rdos wrote:
blackicmenace wrote:
He sounds a lot like me when I was young. Very immature, I knew I liked them, but didn't have a clue how to act on all those emotions. He is probably afraid to make a misstep and ruin things between you both. Perhaps you should take the first step like Jimmy has suggested.


I think that is breaking the rules of the game, and so a bad idea.

It took a woman that was capable of convincing me I was worthy of her affection. Assuming his issues are stemming from self loathing, it may be true for him as well. Just speculation of course.


Maybe if it is self loathing, but not if it is shyness.



blackicmenace
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24 May 2019, 2:33 pm

rdos wrote:
blackicmenace wrote:
rdos wrote:
blackicmenace wrote:
He sounds a lot like me when I was young. Very immature, I knew I liked them, but didn't have a clue how to act on all those emotions. He is probably afraid to make a misstep and ruin things between you both. Perhaps you should take the first step like Jimmy has suggested.


I think that is breaking the rules of the game, and so a bad idea.

It took a woman that was capable of convincing me I was worthy of her affection. Assuming his issues are stemming from self loathing, it may be true for him as well. Just speculation of course.


Maybe if it is self loathing, but not if it is shyness.

I have mentioned she should take it slow with him.


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24 May 2019, 10:11 pm

When I was in high school and I found out a girl I liked also liked me my first response was to run away. It could be that, or it could be a million other things.


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angelofdarkness
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25 May 2019, 10:50 pm

Well he asked what I thought of a mug someone tagged me in on fb as a joke, and offered to buy it for me which i didn't feel comfortable even accepting, i told him to watch it. He got all defensive and said okau okay, maybe for Christmas or something l. Im extremely confused, whats the point of trying to buy something after all the confusion i was put though


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25 May 2019, 10:55 pm

angelofdarkness wrote:
Well he asked what I thought of a mug someone tagged me in on fb as a joke, and offered to buy it for me which i didn't feel comfortable even accepting, i told him to watch it. He got all defensive and said okau okay, maybe for Christmas or something l. Im extremely confused, whats the point of trying to buy something after all the confusion i was put though
Maybe he feels sorry & that is his way of trying to make it up to you so to speak


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angelofdarkness
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25 May 2019, 11:01 pm

nick007 wrote:
angelofdarkness wrote:
Well he asked what I thought of a mug someone tagged me in on fb as a joke, and offered to buy it for me which i didn't feel comfortable even accepting, i told him to watch it. He got all defensive and said okau okay, maybe for Christmas or something l. Im extremely confused, whats the point of trying to buy something after all the confusion i was put though
Maybe he feels sorry & that is his way of trying to make it up to you so to speak


It makes no sense,oh all the pain i put you through heres a lousy gift


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