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Kitty4670
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19 Oct 2021, 7:18 pm

I been talking to this guy for 3 weeks, he suddenly ghost me out of nowhere. I think he really liked me. What he did by ghosting me after 3 weeks without an explanation was rude & childish, he acted like a teenager. Why do men do this? I know I can do it too, but when I do it it’s different, it’s because of my Aspergers, I can get overwhelmed with 4 or 5 guys wanting to talk to me, it can be toooooo much, I can start to overload or I really don’t know what to say, but I don’t ghost anyone after 3 weeks of talking to them. Today 7 men want to talk to me.


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funeralxempire
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19 Oct 2021, 7:58 pm

Everyone has their own reasons and believes those reasons were solid.


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Fnord
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20 Oct 2021, 9:12 am

I ghosted women only when I could no longer put up with their selfish drama and verbal abuse.



Minervx_2
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21 Oct 2021, 9:10 am

Quote:
Why do men do this?


It's not a gender thing. Both genders do this. I've been ghosted by women at least a dozen times.



AquaineBay
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21 Oct 2021, 3:58 pm

First both men and women ghost each other. Secondly if he really liked you why would he then ghost you afterwards? With due respect I honestly don't think he actually liked you or at least not in the way that you think he did.

Since you have 7 other guys that you can talk to I would just call it an "L" and move on. There are too many reasons as to why people ghost others and in most cases it's best to just move on.



cyberdad
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21 Oct 2021, 4:08 pm

I'll be honest and say I have ghosted women. But the same has been done to me plenty of times.

TBF online platforms make it easier these days to behave in this manner.



DuckHairback
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22 Oct 2021, 7:29 am

I've ghosted women before it was even called ghosting. I think I did it because I was young and inexperienced and unsure of what was expected of me. I was insecure, fearful. I wasn't trying to hurt anyone. But I understand it was hurtful.

I don't think it's much of a stretch to imagine that people on dating sites are people who have found real-world dating to be difficult. Perhaps you're more likely to find people who are likely to ghost you on a dating site?



kraftiekortie
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22 Oct 2021, 7:30 am

It’s a punk move to ghost someone—though I understand why it’s done.



Fnord
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22 Oct 2021, 9:01 am

"Turnabout is fair play" -- The only people who deserve to complain about being ghosted are those who have never ghosted anyone, or who who have never given the "silent treatment" to anyone else.



Descartes
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26 Oct 2021, 2:44 pm

People ghost because they lose interest and don't feel like being upfront about it, so they take the easy way out. That's how my ex broke up with me, so I know how s****y it is.


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that1weirdgrrrl
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26 Oct 2021, 9:37 pm

Descartes wrote:
People ghost because they lose interest and don't feel like being upfront about it, so they take the easy way out. That's how my ex broke up with me, so I know how s****y it is.


Saaaaaame, I can attest it sucks.

Also, i love your icon pic :lol:


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Descartes
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27 Oct 2021, 12:24 am

that1weirdgrrrl wrote:
Descartes wrote:
People ghost because they lose interest and don't feel like being upfront about it, so they take the easy way out. That's how my ex broke up with me, so I know how s****y it is.


Saaaaaame, I can attest it sucks.

Also, i love your icon pic :lol:


Thank you mucho. I love yours, too! :)


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Lunella
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27 Oct 2021, 1:21 am

I think there's different types of ghosting tbh, the ones where you're not invested in the person and you've only had a minor conversation are fine but the long drawn out type ones where you've invested a lot of time are just outright narcissistic imo. That kind of behaviour is becoming normalised in society when it shouldn't because it's a lack of respect for the person who is being ghosted. The person doing it is using some pretty bad personality traits that have become normalised imo.


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Fnord
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27 Oct 2021, 9:23 am

Lunella wrote:
I think there's different types of ghosting tbh, the ones where you're not invested in the person and you've only had a minor conversation are fine but the long drawn out type ones where you've invested a lot of time are just outright narcissistic imo. That kind of behaviour is becoming normalised in society when it shouldn't because it's a lack of respect for the person who is being ghosted. The person doing it is using some pretty bad personality traits that have become normalised imo.
The third kind is when you are so fed up with the other person's bushlit that you want nothing more to do with them.



Ettina
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27 Oct 2021, 11:10 am

Fnord wrote:
Lunella wrote:
I think there's different types of ghosting tbh, the ones where you're not invested in the person and you've only had a minor conversation are fine but the long drawn out type ones where you've invested a lot of time are just outright narcissistic imo. That kind of behaviour is becoming normalised in society when it shouldn't because it's a lack of respect for the person who is being ghosted. The person doing it is using some pretty bad personality traits that have become normalised imo.


The third kind is when you are so fed up with the other person's bushlit that you want nothing more to do with them.


And sometimes with that kind, if you try to tell them you're leaving, they'll throw a tantrum. Maybe even become dangerous.



Blue_Star
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27 Oct 2021, 12:17 pm

Kitty4670 wrote:
I know I can do it too, but when I do it it’s different, it’s because of my Aspergers...


From the other side, this isn't any different. They don't know your reason when you ghost any more than you know theirs when they ghost. Either way is rude but unfortunately normal nowadays. The Asperger's might be a reason, but it isn't going to be obvious to people who don't know or don't understand.