Dating Someone YouDont Like Just For Relationship Experience

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What Would You Do? (Read Post Before Voting)
Date her. At least you get romantic and sexual experience which could be beneficial later and you can always end the relationship if you dont like it. 30%  30%  [ 12 ]
Don't date her. It's not worth it to date someone you don't like if you're not attracted to them. Hold out for someone who you are attracted to. 70%  70%  [ 28 ]
Total votes : 40

cyberdad
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14 Jan 2022, 11:26 pm

Aspie1 wrote:
Today, all women, no matter how badly unattractive, can replace a man as easily as they can replace a pair panties.


There is some truth to this but I'm just saying it takes a lot more effort to wriggle out of an established de-facto relationship than a couple of dates or a hookup.



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15 Jan 2022, 1:11 pm

Billy Beta has a trump card that Bertha doesn't.

Money and/or fame.



Aspie1
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15 Jan 2022, 3:26 pm

cyberdad wrote:
There is some truth to this but I'm just saying it takes a lot more effort to wriggle out of an established de-facto relationship than a couple of dates or a hookup.

Not really. All a woman needs to do is call the whaaaambulance, say "I'm not happy!", and just leave. And if she's married, she'll get the house, the car, the dog, the custody of the kids, her husband's antique stamp collection, 50% of his bank account assets, the alimony until she remarries, and the child support (which is the only legit part).



Mona Pereth
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15 Jan 2022, 4:12 pm

Aspie1 wrote:
Today, all women, no matter how badly unattractive, can replace a man as easily as they can replace a pair panties.

Perhaps so, if all that the woman is looking for is sex. But that's not most women, attractive or otherwise.

Most women are looking for a longterm relationship. And there are plenty of heterosexual women, even relatively attractive ones, who are not able to find a compatible man who wants a longterm relationship with them.


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Last edited by Mona Pereth on 15 Jan 2022, 4:24 pm, edited 2 times in total.

Mona Pereth
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15 Jan 2022, 4:21 pm

Aspie1 wrote:
Not really. All a woman needs to do is call the whaaaambulance, say "I'm not happy!", and just leave. And if she's married, she'll get the house, the car, the dog, the custody of the kids, her husband's antique stamp collection, 50% of his bank account assets, the alimony until she remarries, and the child support (which is the only legit part).

There is certainly no guarantee that the woman gets all these things.

Laws vary from one jurisdiction to another. Divorce is almost always a major financial setback for both ex-spouses.


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16 Jan 2022, 1:16 am

Mona Pereth wrote:
Most women are looking for a longterm relationship. And there are plenty of heterosexual women, even relatively attractive ones, who are not able to find a compatible man who wants a longterm relationship with them.


The lines here are quite fuzzy before the age of 30 for most young women. My understanding is the commitment to a long term relationship is somewhat flexible before 30. I've known plenty of young women in their 20s who enjoy the narcissistic pleasure of having different men hit on them.

Now with the social media age I imagine the narcissistic traits and unrealistic expectations are worse. Single women are increasingly happier to date/hookup until they meet their "prince". However unrealistic their expectations.



cyberdad
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16 Jan 2022, 1:18 am

Aspie1 wrote:
cyberdad wrote:
There is some truth to this but I'm just saying it takes a lot more effort to wriggle out of an established de-facto relationship than a couple of dates or a hookup.

Not really. All a woman needs to do is call the whaaaambulance, say "I'm not happy!", and just leave. And if she's married, she'll get the house, the car, the dog, the custody of the kids, her husband's antique stamp collection, 50% of his bank account assets, the alimony until she remarries, and the child support (which is the only legit part).


That is always something that hangs over every relationship whether defacto or marriage. Life is sometimes about taking risks.



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17 Jan 2022, 3:02 pm

It’s not worth dating someone you aren’t attracted to and don’t like. It’s better to wait because dating someone just for the experience if you know you’ll break up due to not being attracted to them in any way. That’s how people get their feelings hurt.


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19 Jan 2022, 8:58 pm

xxZeromancerlovexx wrote:
It’s not worth dating someone you aren’t attracted to and don’t like. It’s better to wait because dating someone just for the experience if you know you’ll break up due to not being attracted to them in any way. That’s how people get their feelings hurt.
It might be worth it for men under 24. (Women never have to settle and can find an attractive boyfriend easily, both for social and evolutionary reasons, so this doesn't apply to them.) After all, NOTHING can truly replace YOUNG love. So a man is better off having at least some girlfriend at a young age, even a totally unattractive one, unless she's too boring and incompatible to even be a good girlfriend. Basically, don't do more than 55% of the work to set up your dates.

A first relationship at age 20 and a first relationship at age 30 are nowhere near similar to each other. The former is fun and exciting; the latter is banal and mundane. And not having a relationship at a young age will be HUGE hindrance a decade later, because you'll never have had that fun, young love experience most people fondly remember. So it's best to get it accomplished at a young age at any cost, even if that means foregoing one's girlfriend's attractiveness.



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05 Feb 2022, 4:27 pm

Aspie1 wrote:
cyberdad wrote:
Once Billy get's Bertha to sign on the dotted line most of the hard work is done. Its too much effort, even for Bertha, to start all over again.
That was then, this is now.

Today, all women, no matter how badly unattractive, can replace a man as easily as they can replace a pair panties. So no man other than Chad is immune from being dumped on a woman's emotional whim. The only solution is to control your emotions, and not get too attached to whatever woman shows interest. Because she could be gone just moments later.

Long gone the days of slavery of women in couples. They have rights now, and they wont risk getting killed if they try to leave. That's not exactly a bad thing. What kinda person would really want to keep a woman who doesnt care about them, like them, or wants anything to do with them. I mean I get it, dating women is super difficult, I know from experience, and so is dating guys, and one might never convince them of their worth. But I dont see taking them as prisoners as a resolve for this issue. Otherwise we'd all be like the Pakistanese or Arabs.


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05 Feb 2022, 4:41 pm

cyberdad wrote:
Aspie1 wrote:
cyberdad wrote:
On the flipside "Chads" get so much "female action" they just become accustomed to a different girl whenever they feel like it so it probably becomes boring and meaningless for them too... (quote truncated)
It works both ways. Your average Billy Beta usually has no choice BUT TO date someone he's not attracted to. It's his only chance to find a relationship or at least some semblance of it it. Unlike Chads, who have women jumping on them every day like overexcited puppies, a Billy Beta has a woman show interest in him once every few years, if that. So when a Billy Beta gets a chance at a relationship even with an unattractive, boring woman, he has to TAKE IT; otherwise, he'll be alone for yet another few more years.


Once Billy is in a relationship he has the choice to make it work. It takes two to tango, so its also in the interests of the "boring unattractive" woman to make the relationship work as she too might not want to go back on the market. Once you get past the dating phase and are actually started a relationship the dynamics change. It doesn't matter for Billy Beta if he marries a supermodel "becky" or "Boring" big Bertha. The excitement of the sex and looking at eye candy wear off and reality kicks in.

That explains why beauty is a curse. What if Billy was never attracted to Bertha to begin with, and his feelings about her looks wouldnt have to change. Then Bertha wouldn't have to get defensive and princessy on his butt. But then she would find out she isnt and will never be beautiful to him, and that will reinforce the way she feels about her body. How can Billy sleep with Bertha his whole life without having ever been attracted to her. Is she just his gummy doll he turns the light off on? That might get old for even Billy.


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05 Feb 2022, 4:46 pm

cyberdad wrote:
Aspie1 wrote:
A "boring, unattractive woman" can find a replacement relationship hundreds of times faster than a Billy Beta can. So she has A LOT less to lose by turning down a man she's not attracted to. Not to mention, she'll get 100+ messages a day the minute she joins Tinder et al. While an equivalent man has no choice but to date whichever woman likes him, even if she's very boring to be around and mildly embarrassing to be seen with.


Oh believe me I know from experience. I started noticing from the late 1990s as the internet era of Myspace and facebook began to emerge that unattractive women started behaving like princesses. They may be a connection to the internet? I don't know. But yes the odds are still in big Bertha's favor compared to poor old desperate Billy Beta.

But for the unattractive woman who is in a relationship, the temptation to jump ship isn't that attractive as she still knows she's not the topic pick for other men and there's the whole having to share with her friends/family the breakup thing, and also there is still the tendency to "settle" once you are in a relationship to try and make it work.

Once Billy get's Bertha to sign on the dotted line most of the hard work is done. Its too much effort, even for Bertha, to start all over again.

Just because Bertha is Shapely doesnt make her unattractive. Big Bertha might be a real princess.

Billy Beta might be a princess himself. xD

"Big Bertha, German (censored) Bertha, a type of 420-mm (16.5-inch) howitzer that was first used by the German army to bombard Belgian and French forts during World War I. ... At the time of their construction, the Big Berthas were the largest, most-powerful mobile artillery pieces in use by any army." - sounds like Beyonce.

"Beta Ray Bill is a fictional superhero appearing in American comic books published by Marvel Comics. " - "I designed Bill deliberately as a monster, because I knew that people would look at it and go, "Oh my God, it's this evil guy." I deliberately wrote them so you weren't sure in the beginning if he was a good guy or a bad guy ... I chose the name for its alliterative qualities." O:


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07 Feb 2022, 3:55 pm

Aspie1 wrote:
cyberdad wrote:
Once Billy get's Bertha to sign on the dotted line most of the hard work is done. Its too much effort, even for Bertha, to start all over again.
That was then, this is now.

Today, all women, no matter how badly unattractive, can replace a man as easily as they can replace a pair panties. So no man other than Chad is immune from being dumped on a woman's emotional whim. The only solution is to control your emotions, and not get too attached to whatever woman shows interest. Because she could be gone just moments later.


That's not true as there are women who struggle to find a relationships, I suspect some of them would disagree that they can replace a man as easily as a pair of panties.


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11 Feb 2022, 12:29 pm

sometimes i get annoyed when people say that women need dating or relationship skills as well



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12 Feb 2022, 8:43 pm

WantToHaveALife wrote:
sometimes i get annoyed when people say that women need dating or relationship skills as well

They do. Otherwise they get raped repeatedly or ignored.

Ain't nobody silent in relationships just showing their panties. If that happens it's totally wrong and traumatizing.

You don't get to keep relationships healthy or at all without giving in everything you got and more.

Plus to conquer + reconquer a woman and a guy it's not working with just panties.

Women don't magically have the answers or read minds, they learn like anybody else and deal with unexpected and crisis situations.


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14 Feb 2022, 12:13 pm

I wouldn't do that, BUT, someone else might - entirely up to the individual and their values, morals etc. If the person making the decision to do it is Okay with it and whatever fallout may come of it - the end justifies the means for them - then they could do it and be A-Okay with it.

I did read the post a few down that said maybe a non-exclusive fwb thing -> that, to me, would be much more acceptable IF someone was going to connect with someone else just for the sake of hooking up. Then they're at least not leading them on pretending there's a relationship beginning that has a chance of becoming a long term thing.

But everyone's different in their own personal moral code, as well as romantic opportunities etc, so it's entirely up to the individual and Not Me or what I would do. I can say with ease I wouldn't do that thing Because I know that I don't have great difficulty getting laid - I've had hundreds of partners. So I'd never ever Ever date someone I wasn't into to get laid. I doubt I'd want to hookup with them either. BUT, if I were different and in the situation described by the OP I might have a different opinion entirely. So, that's what I would/wouldn't do, but the OP needs to do whatever is right for them and their situation and life.


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