Guys to overprotective of there girlfriends?

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Twilightprincess
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08 Aug 2022, 7:34 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
I've actually met quite a few women who are into fitness---including weights.

Of course, "fitness" involves much more than just weights. I don't mean talking about "supplements." I don't believe in them myself.

I, myself, am not really into fitness, actually.

Why do you want Jamesy to talk about weights? There are lots of other topics that would be more appropriate to talk about with a brand new acquaintance unless the woman obviously falls into one of the demographics I listed above or is wearing a sports jersey.

Not that he wants to rush into dating at the moment anyway.


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kraftiekortie
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08 Aug 2022, 8:35 pm

It's more like I would advise James to speak about fitness than about "weights" per se----as I mentioned in a previous post.

Many women happen to be into fitness, based upon my communications with women----yoga is important in at least some women's lifestyles. Yoga can be an indispensable part of "fitness."



Twilightprincess
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08 Aug 2022, 8:39 pm

How exactly would this conversation with a new acquaintance about personal fitness go?

It would be more typical to ask about interests and hobbies, once the conversation was well under way, than to mention something as specific as personal fitness. That could make some feel self conscious, especially if they aren’t happy with their body at the time for whatever reason.


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kraftiekortie
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08 Aug 2022, 8:43 pm

Of course, "hobbies and interests."

Where did I say he shouldn't talk about his "hobbies and interests."

I'm talking about after the introductory phase.

He's into fitness. Many women are into fitness. If a woman isn't into fitness, I wouldn't broach the subject. Move on to something else.

There's potential there for a substantive conversation based upon mutual interests.

I'm just expressing ideas. None of what I say has to be 100% applicable. I don't know if it would be applicable or not. I'm just putting ideas "out there." Putting ideas "out there" is an essential part of dialogue.



Twilightprincess
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08 Aug 2022, 9:07 pm

I think that fixing problem behaviors and patterns should be the main focus right now. It’s probably not the right time to date, as Jamesy has mentioned.

I would avoid one night stands as well TBH.


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CockneyRebel
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08 Aug 2022, 9:11 pm

If you see a girl who's out with a guy, don't talk to the girl. Chances are that the guy is her boyfriend, more often than not.


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Nades
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09 Aug 2022, 1:07 am

Twilightprincess wrote:
How exactly would this conversation with a new acquaintance about personal fitness go?

It would be more typical to ask about interests and hobbies, once the conversation was well under way, than to mention something as specific as personal fitness. That could make some feel self conscious, especially if they aren’t happy with their body at the time for whatever reason.


It is a hobby and interest for many women though. It might be apparent if someone is a fitness fanatic at first glance.

As for one night stands, I wouldn't rule them out. I'm of the mindset that intimacy is often hard enough for an autisitc so any opportunity for sex isn't to be passed up. It's not like autisitcs can pick and choose very often when it comes to sex but it'll need to be with women who are single ideally.



Twilightprincess
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09 Aug 2022, 4:39 am

Nades wrote:
As for one night stands, I wouldn't rule them out. I'm of the mindset that intimacy is often hard enough for an autisitc so any opportunity for sex isn't to be passed up. It's not like autisitcs can pick and choose very often when it comes to sex but it'll need to be with women who are single ideally.


That’s a dangerous mindset to have. Masturbation is safer, for a variety of reasons, than having sex when any opportunity presents itself.


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klanka
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09 Aug 2022, 4:42 am

Safer, yes.
I don't know how it is for women, but for men, masturbating is a hollow and empty experience whereas having actual sex feels great..and might end up in one of those things autistic individuals have trouble finding...a relationship.

It's a bit like saying staying home and being unemployed is safer than driving to work each day. Staying home would be a depressing and empty experience.



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09 Aug 2022, 4:51 am

klanka wrote:
Safer, yes.
I don't know how it is for women, but for men, masturbating is a hollow and empty experience whereas having actual sex feels great..and might end up in one of those things autistic individuals have trouble finding...a relationship.

It's a bit like saying staying home and being unemployed is safer than driving to work each day. Staying home would be a depressing and empty experience.


Having a one night stand, especially with anyone, would be an empty experience for many people.

It seems like many of the women Jamesy is around drink, so there could be issues regarding consent as well. Hopefully, any opportunity, if he adheres to that mindset, would involve sober women only and not those who’ve overindulged.


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Nades
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09 Aug 2022, 7:28 am

Twilightprincess wrote:
Nades wrote:
As for one night stands, I wouldn't rule them out. I'm of the mindset that intimacy is often hard enough for an autisitc so any opportunity for sex isn't to be passed up. It's not like autisitcs can pick and choose very often when it comes to sex but it'll need to be with women who are single ideally.


That’s a dangerous mindset to have. Masturbation is safer, for a variety of reasons, than having sex when any opportunity presents itself.


I've seen autisitc people ruing the day they passed up the chance to have sex on this very forum 15+ years later.

It needs to be weighed up. If someone hasn't had sex or had very little and they're 30 or (insert age here), then they can throw a little more caution to the wind than most.

Making it to an age where people typically have their first kids and having a virtually dead sex life up to that point then I think overall risks of STD's or unwanted safety risks will still be lower than the average person even with the occasional reckless encounter.

If I haven't had sex in 5 years I would still have it if I encountered an opportunity, condom or not. I've indeed done so after dry spells too. I don't regret it.



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09 Aug 2022, 8:20 am

Nades wrote:
Twilightprincess wrote:
Nades wrote:
As for one night stands, I wouldn't rule them out. I'm of the mindset that intimacy is often hard enough for an autisitc so any opportunity for sex isn't to be passed up. It's not like autisitcs can pick and choose very often when it comes to sex but it'll need to be with women who are single ideally.


That’s a dangerous mindset to have. Masturbation is safer, for a variety of reasons, than having sex when any opportunity presents itself.


I've seen autisitc people ruing the day they passed up the chance to have sex on this very forum 15+ years later.

It needs to be weighed up. If someone hasn't had sex or had very little and they're 30 or (insert age here), then they can throw a little more caution to the wind than most.

Making it to an age where people typically have their first kids and having a virtually dead sex life up to that point then I think overall risks of STD's or unwanted safety risks will still be lower than the average person even with the occasional reckless encounter.

If I haven't had sex in 5 years I would still have it if I encountered an opportunity, condom or not. I've indeed done so after dry spells too. I don't regret it.




I am nearly 33 and still never sex yet 8O


I am will to bet my money I will be the 40 year old virgin.



kraftiekortie
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09 Aug 2022, 8:42 am

That's a lot better than being 33 with some sort of STD passed along during a "one-night stand."



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09 Aug 2022, 9:01 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
That's a lot better than being 33 with some sort of STD passed along during a "one-night stand."


I absolutely agree, and as I’ve already stated that’s not the only risk involved.


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kraftiekortie
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09 Aug 2022, 9:07 am

Of course, there are many risks to the woman, too.

Especially....getting pregnant, or getting abused by the man in some way.

There's always a risk to all genders during one-night stands.



klanka
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09 Aug 2022, 9:22 am

On American TV they used say 'if i want to get laid i'll just go to a bar!' but even that is quite difficult :D
That was lampooned on 'Ally McBeal' when someone said it , then later admitted it was false.

Also on American TV if someone was found to be a drinker, they were automatically assumed to have a problem and need an intervention. The drinker was always found with a bottle of spirits, hardly ever beer either :D
After 'its always sunny' came out I think the attitude to alcohol on TV has normalised.