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WhiteWidow
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19 Jul 2012, 8:39 am

I was in a store and I know the store clerk, so we're kind of buddies I guess but not really, we're just on really good terms. So anyways I come in and I lay out the housing crash that's coming in the next coming years for Canada as it slowly "cools" down meaning minimal crashes each month after month as rents rise across the board etc. when foreign internationals begin moving in their money as housing prices come down, and then the western culture either restarts as they begin getting loans etc. or if these foreigners will implement new entitlement programs altogether. So anyways, nobody understands me whenever I try explaining this to them and they need to stop consuming - I will ask people in public why they have iPhones and none of them can tell me why they just say "I like having it" or "I like having the internet on my phone", and I started talking to this girl on the bench beside me at the bus stop - and she ignored me. She didn't look at me, smile at me, say anything. I was right beside her, and she wasn't listening to any music. She was reading, but she could have at least stopped for a few seconds. I mean - isn't this society? Shouldn't people be scared of this coming crash? Shouldn't there be more individuals taking up responsibility, and conversing about how we can change our consumer culture? It's tearing our relationships apart, and we're going to find ourselves eating nothing but kraft dinner because we'll all be on some sort of government assistance, and the people who are already on government assistance will be left out in the street unless they have a disability that they can claim - and then eventually even people on disability will be told that they are inadequate, and if they don't work at some sort of job like the rest of society, then they'll lose their government subsidies as many employers will be hiring since they're all coming from overseas and exporting their big business' that they're building up / merging with right now. And then comes the influx of anti depressants and that's when drug stocks soar, and life insurance stocks because people will be committing suicide more often and then they'll open up places where you can voluntarily commit suicide - just like the heart attack grill. And nobody wants to talk about it - this world makes me sooo sick! I hate leaving my apartment



arielhawksquill
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19 Jul 2012, 9:41 am

Dude, if you sat down next to me at a bus stop and started ranting about those things, I would pretend to read, too. Part of "society" is respecting the right of other people to mind their own business. Nobody owes you an audience for your ideas. The shop clerk in particular is going to be displeased by your insistence that we all stop consuming--he sells things for a living.



PTSmorrow
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19 Jul 2012, 10:42 am

arielhawksquill wrote:
Dude, if you sat down next to me at a bus stop and started ranting about those things, I would pretend to read, too. Part of "society" is respecting the right of other people to mind their own business. Nobody owes you an audience for your ideas. ...


That's definitely right, why don't you leave people alone? I hate to be annoyed by strangers and therefore consequently ignore them. Unless it would be a really attractive woman, that is.



tarantella
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19 Jul 2012, 12:22 pm

OK, it kind of sounds like you need to remember that this is a special interest of yours. That doesn't mean it's an invalid concern, nor that other people aren't also concerned about it (though many will either disagree with your assessment of the situation or simply don't think about things that deeply in the first place). But it's a heavy subject. Most people won't be able to click into a conversation about it straight away, largely because they don't spend as much time thinking about it as you do. If I'm reading my book or concentrating on my job, and someone suddenly tries to engage me in a passionate discussion about an impending disaster, I simply won't be able to respond on that same passionate level. I'm NT, so I don't usually engage in what I'm doing to the extent that I can't break my attention to hold any conversation. But an in-depth discussion on the upcoming Canadian housing crash would leave me going "whoa, where did that come from?" I wouldn't be ready for it.

Approaching total strangers and launching into this subject is unlikely to ever end in a way that satisfies you, because as social behaviour it is just too "out there" for most NTs to handle. They will feel uncomfortable and possibly intimidated, and they'll shut down like the girl with the book did. She may also feel concerned about the issues you brought up, but the social context doesn't allow her to respond like you want her to. We honestly can't switch off the social chunk of brain that immediately says "this behaviour is inappropriate, you don't know what other boundaries this person might transgress, so just try not to move and hope that they'll leave you alone". Any kind of impromptu rant is unlikely to provoke a positive response, because that's how our brains work.

Also, if your store clerk friend was working when you approached him, he quite likely didn't even have time for more than a quick hello. He would probably get in trouble if he took significant time out to talk with you, and he might have had customers needing his attention.



aspiemike
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19 Jul 2012, 3:31 pm

Don't take offense. I didn't even finish reading your post. And I am an Aspie. You posted way too much information. Keep it short and to the point if at all possible.



Sharkgirl
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19 Jul 2012, 3:44 pm

I am interested in what u are saying. Simply because I believe it as well. Humanity is on a collision course into self destruction and no one is saying anything. The collective denial of the situation used to drive me insane. Now I am part Of environmental cOnservation groups trying to spread the word. Find other like minded people and keep sPreading the word eventually the message will get through.


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Echo1030
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19 Jul 2012, 3:48 pm

When you ask people to explain to you why they have iphones, it comes across as condescending/arrogant :(



redrobin62
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19 Jul 2012, 3:57 pm

I respectfully disagree with people who say society is doomed. It's a generalization of their own failures, that is, they haven't achieved what they've set out to accomplish so it's someone else's fault. Also, if some stranger came up to me at a bus stop and tried to talk rubbish to me while I'm reading something, I'll ignore them. If the subject was relevant, that's a different story.



outofplace
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20 Jul 2012, 1:46 am

I may agree with your point, but the 4 lines of a single run-on sentence is a real turn off. Remember that we tend to have a difficult time not "core dumping" (as an ex-friend would describe it when I did it) information. However, it's irritating to other people when we do it. Heck, it is irritating to another aspie if an aspie does it! A conversation is supposed to be a two way street. In order for it to be one, you have to realize there is a time and data limit you need to set for your turn in the exchange. I have found that about 20 seconds is the limit for one side to talk in a conversation 90% of the time. Remember: You want to have a two sided conversation, not give a lecture or a speech. This means the other person gets equal time to speak. I have had to learn this from people telling me where I go wrong. (Believe me, I do this A LOT!) Most people will not be so kind. They will just choose to ignore you or bully you.

This also goes for forum postings. Most people don't want to read an encyclopedic description of something. You need to learn how to reduce it down to a basic overview and fill in the blanks later in the conversation. This means that, even if it is a long post, it needs to be separated into paragraphs with good punctuation and spelling. Try to limit tangential points too as they make it difficult for the reader to comprehend what you are trying to say. My suggestion with forum posting then is to re-read what you wrote and make sure someone else will be able to read it without irritation too.


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PastFixations
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23 Jul 2012, 7:56 am

Well it's going to be very rare if you want someone to talk about that... but the simple boring stuff gets you conversing better.


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