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Mikah
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24 Mar 2021, 12:45 pm

https://babylonbee.com/news/ted-cruz-do ... on-centers

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Ted Cruz Dons All-White Suit To Cry Outside Biden's Detention Centers

DONNA, TX—After disturbing pictures were released of conditions inside migrant detention facilities on the border, Senator Ted Cruz donned a bright white suit and visited the border with a camera crew to weep bitterly outside the chain-link fence.

"I'm here to see what's really going on down here," said Cruz, tears streaming down his face. "It's even worse than I thought. These are literal concentration camps. The president is literally Hitler. I can't believe this is happening in America."

Cruz then doubled over, overcome with grief as camera flashes went off.

"WHHHYYYYYYYY? Oh, the humanity!" he cried, screaming toward the sky.

The Texas senator then posted the photos on social media so the world could share in his righteous indignation. Unfortunately, Twitter and Facebook suspended his account for taking unauthorized photos of a federal facility.


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As it will be in the future, it was at the birth of Man -
There are only four things certain since Social Progress began: -
That the Dog returns to his Vomit and the Sow returns to her Mire,
And the burnt Fool’s bandaged finger goes wabbling back to the Fire;

And that after this is accomplished, and the brave new world begins
When all men are paid for existing and no man must pay for his sins,
As surely as Water will wet us, as surely as Fire will burn,
The Gods of the Copybook Headings with terror and slaughter return!


Gromit
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24 Mar 2021, 1:34 pm

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Brictoria
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26 Mar 2021, 1:24 am

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Quote:
"When people express opinions that differ from yours, take it as a chance to grow. Seek to understand over being understood. Be curious, not defensive. The only way to disarm another human being is by listening." - Glennon Doyle Melton

Quote:
"Never forget that you have every right to question any individual, system, movement, or group that only tolerates you when you think and behave exactly like them" - Africa Brooke

Quote:
“There was a saying that a man's true character was revealed in defeat. I thought it was also revealed in victory.”
― Alison Goodman, Eon: Dragoneye Reborn


Gromit
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28 Mar 2021, 12:59 pm

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Mikah
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29 Mar 2021, 5:17 am

The planets align once in a while and SNL actually produce something funny.


_________________
As it will be in the future, it was at the birth of Man -
There are only four things certain since Social Progress began: -
That the Dog returns to his Vomit and the Sow returns to her Mire,
And the burnt Fool’s bandaged finger goes wabbling back to the Fire;

And that after this is accomplished, and the brave new world begins
When all men are paid for existing and no man must pay for his sins,
As surely as Water will wet us, as surely as Fire will burn,
The Gods of the Copybook Headings with terror and slaughter return!


IsabellaLinton
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30 Mar 2021, 3:34 pm

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Misslizard
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30 Mar 2021, 7:44 pm

/\It must have been dumpster diving outside a Indian restaurant digging for a samosa.


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I am the dust that dances in the light. - Rumi


Mikah
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31 Mar 2021, 5:05 am

https://babylonbee.com/news/qanon-gener ... eping-bags

QAnon Generously Donating Tin Foil Hats To Make Migrant Sleeping Bags

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EL PASO, TX—With Biden's border facilities becoming more crowded by the hour, the U.S. is facing a severe shortage of tin foil, since-- according to ICE, immigrants prefer to sleep wrapped up in it. In response, followers of "Q" have generously agreed to donate extra tin foil hats to address the urgent need.

"It's the least I can do," said local QAnon chapter president Dave Smith. "I feel for those poor kids. I just hope they can all escape that border facility before Tom Hanks eats them all."

According to "Q" members, the tin foil will protect migrants from the cold-- as well as cosmic radiation, mind control, vaccine-infected zombies, and Jeffrey Epstein, in case he's still alive.

Officials are warning, however, that if the crisis on the border isn't fixed soon, they'll have to start using Saran Wrap.


_________________
As it will be in the future, it was at the birth of Man -
There are only four things certain since Social Progress began: -
That the Dog returns to his Vomit and the Sow returns to her Mire,
And the burnt Fool’s bandaged finger goes wabbling back to the Fire;

And that after this is accomplished, and the brave new world begins
When all men are paid for existing and no man must pay for his sins,
As surely as Water will wet us, as surely as Fire will burn,
The Gods of the Copybook Headings with terror and slaughter return!


funeralxempire
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05 Apr 2021, 1:22 pm


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politics is dumb but very important
戦争ではなく戦争と戦う


Mikah
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05 Apr 2021, 5:48 pm

^ Does that really belong in this thread? Pretty sure that's an atheist really trying to "argue". I suppose it might be a parody of an edgy teenage atheist who thinks he's intelligent - in which case it does belong and I withdraw my objection.


_________________
As it will be in the future, it was at the birth of Man -
There are only four things certain since Social Progress began: -
That the Dog returns to his Vomit and the Sow returns to her Mire,
And the burnt Fool’s bandaged finger goes wabbling back to the Fire;

And that after this is accomplished, and the brave new world begins
When all men are paid for existing and no man must pay for his sins,
As surely as Water will wet us, as surely as Fire will burn,
The Gods of the Copybook Headings with terror and slaughter return!


Brictoria
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06 Apr 2021, 12:53 am

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_________________
Quote:
"When people express opinions that differ from yours, take it as a chance to grow. Seek to understand over being understood. Be curious, not defensive. The only way to disarm another human being is by listening." - Glennon Doyle Melton

Quote:
"Never forget that you have every right to question any individual, system, movement, or group that only tolerates you when you think and behave exactly like them" - Africa Brooke

Quote:
“There was a saying that a man's true character was revealed in defeat. I thought it was also revealed in victory.”
― Alison Goodman, Eon: Dragoneye Reborn


Mikah
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08 Apr 2021, 7:08 am

https://babylonbee.com/news/60-minutes- ... ith-hitler

60 Minutes Releases Exclusive Secret Photos Of Ron DeSantis Clubbing Baby Seals With Hitler

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TALLAHASSEE, FL—In response to being caught deceptively editing a statement by Florida Governor Ron DeSantis, who later called them "lairs" for pushing a "fake narrative," CBS hit back today with another bombshell.

Several photos, described by CBS as "totally real and authentic," appear to show DeSantis clubbing baby seals with his best friend Adolf Hitler.

"We are shocked and saddened by this terrible reveal of Desantis's past," said correspondent Sharyn Alfonsi. "It would appear from these completely undoctored photographs, that Ron DeSantis is both a fan of clubbing baby seals and a Nazi. Please know that I am just as saddened by this news as I'm sure the rest of the country is."

In a statement, Governor DeSantis replied: "This is not true! I love baby seals! And I've never met Hitler!"

60 Minutes later reported the Governor's statement as: "This is... true! I love [clubbing] baby seals! And I've... met Hitler!"

The governor later thanked CBS for helping to launch his presidential campaign.


_________________
As it will be in the future, it was at the birth of Man -
There are only four things certain since Social Progress began: -
That the Dog returns to his Vomit and the Sow returns to her Mire,
And the burnt Fool’s bandaged finger goes wabbling back to the Fire;

And that after this is accomplished, and the brave new world begins
When all men are paid for existing and no man must pay for his sins,
As surely as Water will wet us, as surely as Fire will burn,
The Gods of the Copybook Headings with terror and slaughter return!


Brictoria
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15 Apr 2021, 7:52 pm

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_________________
Quote:
"When people express opinions that differ from yours, take it as a chance to grow. Seek to understand over being understood. Be curious, not defensive. The only way to disarm another human being is by listening." - Glennon Doyle Melton

Quote:
"Never forget that you have every right to question any individual, system, movement, or group that only tolerates you when you think and behave exactly like them" - Africa Brooke

Quote:
“There was a saying that a man's true character was revealed in defeat. I thought it was also revealed in victory.”
― Alison Goodman, Eon: Dragoneye Reborn


funeralxempire
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18 Apr 2021, 12:16 am


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politics is dumb but very important
戦争ではなく戦争と戦う


Cornflake
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23 Apr 2021, 3:32 pm

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funeralxempire
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25 Apr 2021, 11:15 pm

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politics is dumb but very important
戦争ではなく戦争と戦う