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kevinisginger
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17 Mar 2012, 7:37 pm

I was just wondering if anyone else has problems with unnecessarily burning a lot of bridges with NTs.. I often tend to dismiss most NTs, as I usually end up getting burned without even realizing that I was the cause of it.. How can I prevent this? Should I just accept that I won't be able to get along with NTs?..



Joker
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17 Mar 2012, 8:51 pm

I always use acting to get along with NTs but dont give up it is possible to make NT friends and get along with them.



kevinisginger
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17 Mar 2012, 8:59 pm

Joker wrote:
I always use acting to get along with NTs but dont give up it is possible to make NT friends and get along with them.

the closest i really get to this is I just get taken advantage of for my things. womp. Oh well.



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17 Mar 2012, 9:20 pm

I have burnt a lot of bridges over the years with both acquaintances and family, but the question is so what? I can't really say that I regret the loss of any of them. I learned a long time ago that I was much better off by keeping to myself as much as possible and strictly limiting my involvement with other people. As for having problems interacting with NT's, I subscribe to the philosophy that says if it hurts when you do that, don't do that! Thus, I practice avoidance as much as possible.


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richardbenson
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18 Mar 2012, 12:08 am

I used to love burning bridges. then when i grew up, I figured out co-dependency is the real issue, build the bridge half way so it doesnt have to be burned


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Last edited by richardbenson on 18 Mar 2012, 12:08 am, edited 1 time in total.

Sweetleaf
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18 Mar 2012, 12:08 am

I'm very good at doing that..


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dustyrose
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20 Mar 2012, 1:56 am

Yes, I've lost basically all of my past best friends this way. Looking back I realize I was too clingy and kind of possessive because I tend to only have a couple of friends at a time.



namaste
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20 Mar 2012, 8:32 am

richardbenson wrote:
I used to love burning bridges. then when i grew up, I figured out co-dependency is the real issue, build the bridge half way so it doesnt have to be burned

i like this concept of just avoiding a person whom you dont like rather then burning the bridge completely
there are some relatives whom i hate from core but keep in touch via my husband i ask him to visit them in hospital etc
that way i dont burn bridge completely


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CaptainTrips222
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20 Mar 2012, 2:13 pm

Not necessarily just with NTs. I burn bridges when I feel I've been wronged, and I need a sense of closure. It's a mental good bye forever.



MusicMama
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20 Mar 2012, 2:25 pm

I haven't burned bridges in a while, although I'm frequently tempted to still... Somehow I can recognize it earlier now that I'm older and stop myself and think through things a little more carefully. Getting feedback from someone else (especially someone who doesn't know the person in question) is extremely helpful to me so I can figure out whether I should legitimately burn the bridge or if I'm overreacting. Thank goodness for the internet!