Do you chat with the people that are cutting your hair?

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Tequila
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18 Jul 2013, 3:35 pm

I can't seem to do this at all. I don't know what to talk about, and everything I can think of has probably been discussed loads of times already.

So I just stay mainly silent. I'm not rude or anything, but I probably creep them out because I'm so silent most of the time. I'm not unfriendly (a bit nervous perhaps), just really reserved.



Joe90
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18 Jul 2013, 3:39 pm

We have a hair-dresser that comes to our house to cut our hair (we have done for years), and when she cuts my hair I always like to make sure someone else is there. I've known this hair-dresser for years and so I wouldn't mind striking up conversation with her, but the reason why I like someone else to be there is because when I'm having my hair done I relax like I'm having a massage, and I relax so much that I can't talk because nearly every muscle in my body is relaxed. Listening to conversation relaxes me too.

I wouldn't like to have my hair cut by young girls at a hair-dressers. I prefer to chat to an older person, unless there was a young girl who seems quite shy or down to earth.


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Tequila
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18 Jul 2013, 3:41 pm

Joe90 wrote:
I wouldn't like to have my hair cut by young girls at a hair-dressers.


The woman who cuts my hair is young-ish. I don't have anything in common with her, so I'm just pleasant and let her get on with it.



Tequila
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18 Jul 2013, 3:42 pm

Joe90 wrote:
I'm having my hair done I relax like I'm having a massage, and I relax so much that I can't talk because nearly every muscle in my body is relaxed.


I like the sound of that. :)



IdahoRose
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18 Jul 2013, 3:55 pm

I don't talk to the people who cut my hair either. I stay completely silent. I know that a lot of women like to tell their life story to their hairdressers, but in my case I don't see any point because the thing that is most important in my life (my obsession with fictional characters and having them as imaginary friends) would not be easily understood by most people.



lostinlove
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18 Jul 2013, 4:06 pm

my friend who i have known since i was 2 cuts my hair (I am now 33) i chat incessantly to her. on the odd occasion that she hasn't been able to cut my hair in the last 17 years i have had to get someone else to do it, but i HATE it. it makes me anxious and the conversation is stilted.



SilvaGOAT23
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18 Jul 2013, 4:22 pm

Usually not unless she's not pretty and she strikes the conversation.



benh72
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18 Jul 2013, 4:34 pm

I went to the same barber from when I was a teenager until I was 25.
I was happy to talk to him, because he was familiar; his barber shop was walking distance from my home, and I would regularly walk past because it was along the way to where I was going.
Since I moved from my childhood home I have never replicated this rapport, or desire to talk to the person cutting my hair.
I often get my hair cut at a discount barber - because it is cheap, quick, easy, and familiar, but I still find it uncomfortable when the person cutting my hair tries to engage me in conversation.

Recently my wife started having a hairdresser come to our house to cut her hair, and I decided to get a trim whilst she was here.
Because she was in our house, was familiar, and had become a friend I was able to talk to her as she cut my hair.
I guess it's an aspie thing; though maybe effects us to varying degrees; but I just don't feel comfortable having conversations with strangers, or getting pushed into participating in small talk.
I would say it's partial social anxiety, and partial not wanting to enter into a conversation with someone else who has their own agenda and interests driving the conversation.
That said, if I had someone try to strike up a conversation and the subject coincided with one of my interests, I'd find it hard not to talk.



KingdomOfRats
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18 Jul 2013, 4:36 pm

that woud imply am communicating normaly plus having a convo with self. ;)
just shaved mine off tonight-no mirror and no one directing it still come out perfect acording to staff,but am not arsed if it looks a tip anyway,just want to get rid of the itch and heat.

anyone who hates going to a hair dressers shoud just do it themselves,get a set of electric clippers,there are some designed just for the solo persson to do it,mine are some braun mens ones got em half price at boots a while back,well worth it.


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elsing
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18 Jul 2013, 4:53 pm

This drives me crazy, every hairdresser always wants to know if I'm going out that night, I'm not, I just need my hair cutting because I just do.

Tried making appointments only for Tuesdays or Wednesdays, still i get the same questions

No Idea how I'm supposed to respond to any of this I don't care for these nights out they speak of.


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jmnixon95
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18 Jul 2013, 4:54 pm

no
unless she asks me something, then i reply. when she just says something ("we've been having such weird weather", etc.) it's harder and sometimes i can't say anything quickly enough

i've read that they don't all like having conversations, it's just a sort of a hospitality thing for some. i don't feel too awkward anymore about it



savvyidentity
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18 Jul 2013, 5:15 pm

Yeah I talk to the bloke who cuts my hair. But sometimes he just seems to listen so maybe he's not that interested in what I have to say. I think once I made him uncomfortable/annoyed. I also talk to his brother who was a trainee until recently (so he hasn't cut my hair often) and he's pretty OK to talk to - a lot of the times he seems to like what I have to say about tech and stuff like that. They're kinda down to earth and likable people so I think that makes it easier.

I am very fussy about who cuts my hair though and I only go to an actual barbers, never a self proclaimed hair dresser or stylist. Barbers specialize in mens hair and I often find that the people who cut my hair have been doing it most their life so I always get a good haircut and I'm a little fussy about my hair so I find a good barbers and stick with them for as long as I can. Most often you'll have a bloke cutting your hair (which I found better in all ways.. no offense meant to woman barbers :-p), and they'll be the same two or three people who work there. So you can get to know them a bit.

In my barbers in particularly I think conversation is made easier because of the kind of people they are. They are definately not ignorant people and the kinda people you can have a real actual conversation with (about tech/internet seems fine). So I guess I'm lucky. I did try another barbers for a couple of months but he was the type happy to work in silence (it was just him there) and yeah I think it would have been a little awkward if I wanted to start a conversation. I did sorta try talking to him but he just doesn't like talking whilst working I think.

One thing I found about only going to a barber (and going to the same one all the time) is that it becomes a kind of social experience. Barbers are either small businesses or self run by a qualified barber so I guess they want you to like it there so you come back and give them business. But it's probably more just that they like to talk and don't have a boss breathing down their neck. So I think going to a barbers only and sticking with the same one has meant I could talk to them easily but some less than others.

So yeah another essay I've written but food for thought I guess :-)



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18 Jul 2013, 5:19 pm

I go to the hair dresser maybe once per year, and I go to the one in my apartment building. They are pretty cool, they tried talking to me at first, and I tried to keep up that conversation, but once they learned that I am on the night-shift they stopped talking and let me sleep/doze while they did their thing. Unfortunately, they sold their salon and I haven't been there with the new owner.



WitchsCat
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18 Jul 2013, 5:24 pm

Not usually, unless they talk to me first, or if I want something else done to my hair, I'll let them know. I usually stay silent otherwise.


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Soccer22
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18 Jul 2013, 5:30 pm

I awkwardly/nervously chat with them. I don't like when they ask me questions about where I went to school or if I have siblings or what are my plans that night, etc. I try my best to be friendly though and answer as nice and best as I can. I don't want to offend people who have scissors in their hands....



jk1
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18 Jul 2013, 5:35 pm

I think it can also depend on the hair dresser. Some of them are very chatty and good at talking about many different things. So if they start talking, you can just respond every now and then, or you can talk actively if the topic interests you. If the hair dresser is untalkative, then you have no obligation to start a conversation.

My hair dresser knows me for many years. I don't go to any other one. So although I'm weird and hard to talk to, he is not too uncomfortable with me by now and talks to me about different things. Sometimes we are just silent. I actually went to him yesterday and he told me about some good healthy coffee that he ordered from some company. Also he told me how to pronounce "Jura" in Switzerland (he's swiss). But I generally find having someone so near me and not talking with him/her very uncomfortable. I would never want to go to any other hair dresser.