Page 1 of 4 [ 50 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2, 3, 4  Next

Sherry221B
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 Oct 2013
Age: 120
Gender: Female
Posts: 670
Location: NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS

03 Mar 2015, 1:06 pm

It is reported that Copernicus' parents said the following to him at the age of twelve:

"Copernicus, young man, when are you going to come to terms with the fact that the world does not revolve around you?.

I do not think -- therefore I am not.

Here is the illustration of this principle:
One evening Rene Descartes went to relax at a local tavern. The tender approached and said, "Ah, good evening Monsieur Descartes! Shall I serve you the usual drink?". Descartes replied, "I think not.", and promptly vanished.

There are only 10 types of people in the world: Those who understand binary and those who don´t

Q: Why do they never serve beer at a math party?

A: Because you can't drink and derive...

Q: What is the name of the first electricity detective?
A: Sherlock Ohms

A neutron walked into a bar and asked, "How much for a drink?" The bartender replied, "For you, no charge."

Two atoms were walking across a road when one of them said, "I think I lost an electron!" "Really!" the other replied, "Are you sure?" "Yes, I 'm absolutely positive."

This is apparently a true story. It took place just outside of Munich, Germany.
Heisenberg went for a drive and got stopped by a traffic cop. The cop asked, "Do you know how fast you were going?" Heisenberg replied, "No, but I know where I am."



DeepHour
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 1 Jun 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 43,879
Location: United Kingdom

03 Mar 2015, 2:15 pm

I drink, therefore I am.



Booyakasha
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 6 Oct 2009
Gender: Female
Posts: 13,898

03 Mar 2015, 2:16 pm

Sherry221B wrote:
It is reported that Copernicus' parents said the following to him at the age of twelve:

"Copernicus, young man, when are you going to come to terms with the fact that the world does not revolve around you?.

I do not think -- therefore I am not.

Here is the illustration of this principle:
One evening Rene Descartes went to relax at a local tavern. The tender approached and said, "Ah, good evening Monsieur Descartes! Shall I serve you the usual drink?". Descartes replied, "I think not.", and promptly vanished.

There are only 10 types of people in the world: Those who understand binary and those who don´t

Q: Why do they never serve beer at a math party?

A: Because you can't drink and derive...

Q: What is the name of the first electricity detective?
A: Sherlock Ohms

A neutron walked into a bar and asked, "How much for a drink?" The bartender replied, "For you, no charge."

Two atoms were walking across a road when one of them said, "I think I lost an electron!" "Really!" the other replied, "Are you sure?" "Yes, I 'm absolutely positive."

This is apparently a true story. It took place just outside of Munich, Germany.
Heisenberg went for a drive and got stopped by a traffic cop. The cop asked, "Do you know how fast you were going?" Heisenberg replied, "No, but I know where I am."


Looool :D

Good topic Sherry221B!



Booyakasha
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 6 Oct 2009
Gender: Female
Posts: 13,898

03 Mar 2015, 2:19 pm

DeepHour wrote:
I drink, therefore I am.


bibo ergo sum :D



DeepHour
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 1 Jun 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 43,879
Location: United Kingdom

03 Mar 2015, 2:25 pm

Cogito, ergo bibo.

:)



Booyakasha
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 6 Oct 2009
Gender: Female
Posts: 13,898

03 Mar 2015, 2:42 pm

DeepHour wrote:
Cogito, ergo bibo.

:)




Sherry221B
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 Oct 2013
Age: 120
Gender: Female
Posts: 670
Location: NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS

03 Mar 2015, 2:47 pm

Thanks. I am glad you like them. :)

Image

Image

Image

Image

Image

Image

Image

Image

Image

Image

Let´s be more honest. :)

Booyakasha, you know Latin. That is awesome.

Image


I am glad that you like them too, DeepHour



Booyakasha
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 6 Oct 2009
Gender: Female
Posts: 13,898

03 Mar 2015, 2:52 pm

well those jokes are awesome! :D :thumright:

anyway, I know some Latin, but DeepHour beats me a hundred times at it. :)



Sherry221B
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 Oct 2013
Age: 120
Gender: Female
Posts: 670
Location: NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS

03 Mar 2015, 3:03 pm

That is good, you two. It is the first time in my whole existence that I see others liking these kind of jokes.



Sherry221B
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 Oct 2013
Age: 120
Gender: Female
Posts: 670
Location: NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS

03 Mar 2015, 3:20 pm

Image



TheAP
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 Dec 2014
Age: 23
Gender: Female
Posts: 20,314
Location: Canada

03 Mar 2015, 3:31 pm

It's hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally.

Helium walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve noble gases here." He doesn't react.

Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero? He's 0K now.



Sherry221B
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 Oct 2013
Age: 120
Gender: Female
Posts: 670
Location: NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS

03 Mar 2015, 3:56 pm

Quote:
It's hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally.

Helium walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve noble gases here." He doesn't react.

Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero? He's 0K now.


:lol:



TheAP
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 Dec 2014
Age: 23
Gender: Female
Posts: 20,314
Location: Canada

03 Mar 2015, 4:04 pm

Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail, and, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.



Amity
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 22 Mar 2014
Gender: Female
Posts: 7,714
Location: Meandering

03 Mar 2015, 4:10 pm

:lol: Great idea for a thread.

Image
Image
Image



Sherry221B
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 Oct 2013
Age: 120
Gender: Female
Posts: 670
Location: NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS

04 Mar 2015, 3:22 am

I am glad you liked the thread too. Nice addition, by the way.



Sherry221B
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 Oct 2013
Age: 120
Gender: Female
Posts: 670
Location: NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS

04 Mar 2015, 3:55 am

Image

Being annoying and not letting you to focus.

Image

Has anyone else ever felt like that?