Anyone else on the spectrum not able to cope with Facebook?

Page 1 of 5 [ 73 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2, 3, 4, 5  Next

Noca
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 9 May 2015
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,897
Location: Canada

14 Nov 2015, 8:51 pm

Anyone else here on the spectrum just not able to cope with the social demands and expectations of social networks like Facebook? Anyone else feel overwhelmed and drained that they just don't use those sites at all? It seems like everyone else has a Facebook but me.


_________________
The top gets higher the more that I climb...

Your neurodiverse score: 150 of 200
Your neurotypical score: 51 of 200

officially diagnosed with Asperger's as of 09/11/15

Reassessed 04/11/16
DSM-V: ASD level 2 with Social Communication Severity: level 2, Restrictive Repetitve Behaviour: level 2

ADOS-2 classification: Autism


SilverProteus
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Jul 2007
Gender: Female
Posts: 7,915
Location: Somewhere Over The Rainbow

14 Nov 2015, 8:52 pm

I have a Facebook account but hardly use it.


_________________
"Lightning is but a flicker of light, punctuated on all sides by darkness." - Loki


Edenthiel
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Sep 2014
Age: 53
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,820
Location: S.F Bay Area

14 Nov 2015, 8:58 pm

Yes. I don't use facebook except for two old accounts that I had to create in order to use other sites. Which in itself is incredibly annoying considering the amount of exposure my info and account then has to those other sites. But it was the social aspects, the interactivity that pushed me away from actually being an active user. I look at it and feel like there is just too much going on that I don't understand even though it's really not all that complex, you know?


_________________
“For small creatures such as we the vastness is bearable only through love.”
―Carl Sagan


C2V
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Apr 2015
Posts: 2,666

14 Nov 2015, 9:03 pm

I hear you Noca! I have been trying to work out what Facebook is for, so much so that I looked up the explanation from the people who created it. Some of their ideology makes sense, but seems to little resemble the reality of Facebook as we know it. I can't understand why people are on there, posting pointless pictures of themselves and simply relaying all their personal information to the internet at large. Maybe it's just me, as I tend to be very private, but the idea of putting all your information out there any more than you already have to creeps me out. What is the point in it? I still can't get a satisfactory explanation even from people addicted to Facebook.


_________________
Alexithymia - 147 points.
Low-Verbal.


Neotenous Nordic
Toucan
Toucan

Joined: 11 Oct 2015
Age: 1934
Posts: 275

14 Nov 2015, 9:20 pm

I deleted my account a long time ago.

My reasons for that are not just the social aspects, but the way people dishonestly conduct themselves on there as well as the datamining aspects.

I manage just fine without it. It's not like my social life is any different now than it was when I had an account, so I'm not missing out on anything either way.

The whole thing comes across as extremely narcissistic to me. It rubs me the wrong way in so many ways.



skibum
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 18 Jul 2013
Age: 54
Gender: Female
Posts: 7,300
Location: my own little world

14 Nov 2015, 9:30 pm

I find it a little bit visually overwhelming. I also have an account that someone else set up for me. I barely use it. I have only been on my account less than a handful of times in the past 4 years. I get exhausted with all that stuff on the screen. And I am not very good at figuring out how to navigate through it all and because it is overwhelming to me visually I can't take the time to figure it all out. And I am not into the short "one liner" type things people write. I find it a bit annoying.


_________________
"I'm bad and that's good. I'll never be good and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me."

Wreck It Ralph


Brittniejoy1983
Toucan
Toucan

Joined: 27 Oct 2015
Age: 38
Posts: 284
Location: New Jersey

14 Nov 2015, 10:25 pm

I use Facebook much the same as this, and to maintain a loose connection with family by way of watching their posts, without having to interact with them. If anything, it allows me MORE distance in relationships than in real life. A 'like' here, a quick comment there, and any obligations are superficially fulfilled.



Quill
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Aug 2013
Gender: Female
Posts: 764

14 Nov 2015, 10:46 pm

I had a myspace back when that was the big thing, but I hardly ever used it because I found it overwhelming to deal with, and I only had like five friends on there. I completely abandoned it after a year or so. I've never even bothered with Facebook, although I do have a cousin who is always begging me to sign up. I might do it one of these things, but I imagine it would soon be abandoned, too.

I also tend to have a hard time being active on more than one similar site. I drop by other ASD sites to read from time to time, but this is the only one that I'm signed up for and post on. I'm the same with writing sites, etc. I have a hard enough time keeping up with one site, so trying to be on two or more is just too much for me. I don't understand how some people are on ALL the (whatever topic) sites! I have plenty of time to spend online, but it's just too overwhelming for me, and if you can't/don't visit one of them for a few days or weeks, you get completely left behind.



Brittniejoy1983
Toucan
Toucan

Joined: 27 Oct 2015
Age: 38
Posts: 284
Location: New Jersey

14 Nov 2015, 10:56 pm

Quote:
I had a myspace back when that was the big thing, but I hardly ever used it because I found it overwhelming to deal with, and I only had like five friends on there.


MySpace seemed unnecessarily complicated to me. Entirely too many options.

Quote:
I drop by other ASD sites to read from


There are OTHER ASD sites!? I knew about GRASP, but that lacks a forum-style arena. I couldn't join all of them, but I didn't realize there were more!


_________________
Aspie Quiz: 148 ND/50 NT
AQ: 41 (AQ-10: 9) EQ: 17 SQ: 31 FQ: 44 RAADS-R: 178
ASD Diagnosed 4/22/2016


Grammar Geek
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 22 Oct 2015
Age: 25
Posts: 866
Location: Missouri

15 Nov 2015, 1:00 am

Brittniejoy1983 wrote:
There are OTHER ASD sites!? I knew about GRASP, but that lacks a forum-style arena. I couldn't join all of them, but I didn't realize there were more!


Yeah, I posted on Aspies Central for a while. I think this place is better, though.

I never had a Facebook, nor do I want one. It disgusts me how it's required for so many things now. I just don't understand the allure of social media in general; it's definitely the realm of the NTs. I much prefer message boards, and I would think a lot of Aspies would, since they're usually devoted to one specific subject, and if there's a forum for one of our interests, we could post on them forever. That's why I have over 22,000 posts on a Simpsons forum.



seaweed
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 18 Sep 2015
Age: 26
Posts: 1,380
Location: underwater

15 Nov 2015, 1:14 am

Facebook is hard, I prefer anonymous forums. i go on fb at most twice a month, but don't stay on for more than 5 minutes. I know people who will spend hours on fb, but I get overwhelmed.



Brittniejoy1983
Toucan
Toucan

Joined: 27 Oct 2015
Age: 38
Posts: 284
Location: New Jersey

15 Nov 2015, 2:13 am

seaweed wrote:
Facebook is hard, I prefer anonymous forums.


Facebook just started requiring people to use 'real names', which, personally, I dislike. I somewhat understand why they require it now, but I still think it should be the prerogative of the user to use whatever name they are comfortable with.


_________________
Aspie Quiz: 148 ND/50 NT
AQ: 41 (AQ-10: 9) EQ: 17 SQ: 31 FQ: 44 RAADS-R: 178
ASD Diagnosed 4/22/2016


neilson_wheels
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 11 Mar 2013
Age: 51
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,404
Location: London, Capital of the Un-United Kingdom

15 Nov 2015, 5:12 am

I'm not even slightly interested in the concept.



KyleTheGhost
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 29 Jul 2008
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 70,202
Location: Luna, Imagination Isle

15 Nov 2015, 6:09 am

Heck, no. I've never been on Facebook and I never will.


_________________
I am Transgender. Still Male in body, but Female in mind. I am Ashley.


whatamess
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Aug 2007
Age: 53
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,284

15 Nov 2015, 6:16 am

I've used it a lot over the years in order to keep up with friends back home, as I live so far away and don't have true friends where I live. As time has passed, I am more annoyed by it. In fact, I have been ranting a lot more in the last couple of years as I find the hypocrisy of some annoying. In the last few weeks I have started to think I need to disconnect from it completely, but until I move it's still the best way to keep in touch with my real friends back home (I don't have a cell phone at all).

I also have a friend that without a doubt would be considered ASPIE and he's no longer on it. His wife is still on facebook and that's how I keep in touch with them. Last time I spoke with him he told me he had to get off of it for the same reasons, the stress he was feeling from seeing people he thought were his friends were such hypocrites was too much.



nerdygirl
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 16 Jun 2014
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,645
Location: In the land of abstractions and ideas.

15 Nov 2015, 6:34 am

Facebook does help me feel like I have friends.
I am interested in what is going on with people.

My problem is when "issues" come up - may be political or religious or things in the news or something else. I have difficulty with emotional regulation, so when I see a lot of people commenting about something I find upsetting, especially when their logic is all screwy, I get *very* upset. I should not be upset so much just by what I read on Facebook. I don't take what they say personally. (And it may not be my FB friend being stupid - it could be one of their friends starting a fight.) My reaction is something more like a deep philosophical crisis where I feel like the whole world is crashing in because so many people are stupid.

Unfortunately, "issues" come up all the time. My FB friends don't just talk about going to the grocery store or posting pictures of their dogs (though they do that, too.) They tend to be more serious people who are navigating their way through the complexities of the world.

But, when I see problematic thinking, I want to counter it and point out the flaws and inconsistencies. Every time. But I can't. And even if I had time to do so, I probably wouldn't be listened to. It causes me great stress to see what people actually think and the trajectory that sends them down and not being able to fix it. I can get stuck for days being upset about what someone posted on FB.

So, it is a conundrum for me... I like seeing what's happening in their lives and sorta keeping in touch. But it is such a source of stress when the "issues" come up that I think maybe I should deactivate my account.