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Sailon
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24 Mar 2021, 3:25 pm

I made this thread to bring attention to those of us who are still being bullied into adulthood.
There was a thread on here I read a while back that had a poll asking how long people were bullied for with options for grade school, college, into adulthood, etc. If I find it I will post a link. If I remember correctly, a lot of people were bullied through grade school and then the numbers started falling off with the options for still being bullied later than that.
Maybe we can use this thread to share info.
Anyone who has experienced bullying should feel free to chime in, even if you no longer are dealing with it.

Edit: found the poll thread
viewtopic.php?t=386166



Joe90
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24 Mar 2021, 6:11 pm

I was emotionally bullied at a volunteer job I used to do years ago. I had a minor, harmless quirk that a few of the other women there had to make a big deal of, rather than just brushing it off. And these were women in their 50s and 60s. They'd give each other looks about me, and one day they decided to humiliate me about the minor, harmless quirk, and I could tell it was planned among them.
It was a very cliquey place there, which wasn't what I expected in a voluntary job for a charity.


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Sailon
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27 Mar 2021, 2:27 pm

I get bullied wherever I go it seems like. A even moved a few times, and sure enough people start messing with me again fairly quickly.



Mona Pereth
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28 Mar 2021, 6:34 pm

Sailon wrote:
I get bullied wherever I go it seems like. A even moved a few times, and sure enough people start messing with me again fairly quickly.

What general kind of place do you live? Urban, suburban, or rural?

Also, what country do you live in, and, if you live in a large country, what general region within the country?

I ask because the best ways to handle bullying might be culture-specific, and likewise the reasons for the bullying in the first place might also be culture-specific.


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Summer_Twilight
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29 Mar 2021, 8:56 am

For me bullying

I have dealt with bullying here and there from the age of 2 into adulthood. I have dealt with it in a lot of different areas.

From neighborhood kids, family members, people who were supposed to be my friends, classmates, peers, co-workers and roommates.

However, bullying is very different if you are dealing with children and adolescents as compared to adults

1. When children and teens bully, they don't have that self-control and blurt out mean things
2. In adulthood, it's more passive aggressive and other types of sneaky insults, unless they are extremely immature as my roommates were.


For example, adults may be nice to your face when you are walking by but when you turn around you hear them making fun of you.

Other things they may do, talk about their plans with other people right in front of you, while leaving you out.



Sailon
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05 Apr 2021, 3:15 am

Mona Pereth wrote:
Sailon wrote:
I get bullied wherever I go it seems like. A even moved a few times, and sure enough people start messing with me again fairly quickly.

What general kind of place do you live? Urban, suburban, or rural?

Also, what country do you live in, and, if you live in a large country, what general region within the country?

I ask because the best ways to handle bullying might be culture-specific, and likewise the reasons for the bullying in the first place might also be culture-specific.



I am in the U.S.
I have lived in rural, urban and suburban all.



Joe90
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05 Apr 2021, 4:13 am

Quote:
Other things they may do, talk about their plans with other people right in front of you, while leaving you out.


Oh I've had that. It hurt me to no end. I don't think they were doing it deliberately to upset me though, they were just ignorant people (well, the "alpha" male and "alpha" female of the group were). I felt so left out. These people were all my age and were doing cool things together at weekends like fishing, even though they weren't into fishing really. I'm not into fishing either but the social side of it would have been fun.


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Mona Pereth
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05 Apr 2021, 12:19 pm

Sailon wrote:
Mona Pereth wrote:
What general kind of place do you live? Urban, suburban, or rural?

Also, what country do you live in, and, if you live in a large country, what general region within the country?

I ask because the best ways to handle bullying might be culture-specific, and likewise the reasons for the bullying in the first place might also be culture-specific.



I am in the U.S.
I have lived in rural, urban and suburban all.

Do you live in a culturally homogeneous place, or a place with lots of immigrants? If the latter, are the immigrants mostly from just one country/region or from all over the world?

In my experience and in the experience of my boyfriend, bullying is much more likely to happen in places that are culturally homogeneous or nearly so, and less likely to happen in more cosmopolitan neighborhoods like the one I live in now.


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Summer_Twilight
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06 Apr 2021, 1:06 pm

Joe90 wrote:
Quote:
Other things they may do, talk about their plans with other people right in front of you, while leaving you out.


Oh I've had that. It hurt me to no end. I don't think they were doing it deliberately to upset me though, they were just ignorant people (well, the "alpha" male and "alpha" female of the group were). I felt so left out. These people were all my age and were doing cool things together at weekends like fishing, even though they weren't into fishing really. I'm not into fishing either but the social side of it would have been fun.


I have never heard the term "Alpha," when it comes to male or female. I have heard A-crowd but it makes sense. I had a couple of the Alpha-type females do nasty things to me.

Examples

1. One of my roommates lie to me about having a birthday party that I was not invited to because I didn't fit in

2. When I went to that synagogue, there was this queen bee who behaved like Regina George. She knew I was autistic but she also was jealous of me for whatever reason. This one time, I was talking to another woman when she came along and pulled her away from me.



HeroOfHyrule
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06 Apr 2021, 1:14 pm

I get "bullied" still sometimes. It's usually adults older than me who don't understand my issues and are very impatient. People my age don't bully me as much anymore unless they are very immature.


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Summer_Twilight
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08 Apr 2021, 10:45 am

@Hero:

I was your age when I was lived with my roommates who 6 and 8 years older than I was. Though I never disclosed my diagnosis to them, they knew something was off. They were impatient with me.

However, who in here has ever been guilty of reversed bullying? That is where you fight back at the people who bullied you first?



Sailon
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15 Apr 2021, 12:05 pm

Mona Pereth wrote:
Sailon wrote:
Mona Pereth wrote:
What general kind of place do you live? Urban, suburban, or rural?

Also, what country do you live in, and, if you live in a large country, what general region within the country?

I ask because the best ways to handle bullying might be culture-specific, and likewise the reasons for the bullying in the first place might also be culture-specific.



I am in the U.S.
I have lived in rural, urban and suburban all.

Do you live in a culturally homogeneous place, or a place with lots of immigrants? If the latter, are the immigrants mostly from just one country/region or from all over the world?

In my experience and in the experience of my boyfriend, bullying is much more likely to happen in places that are culturally homogeneous or nearly so, and less likely to happen in more cosmopolitan neighborhoods like the one I live in now.


I've been to all different types if places.
It is happening wherever I go, it seems to be following me around.



Sailon
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24 Apr 2021, 11:55 am

Anyone else have this?



Benjamin the Donkey
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25 Apr 2021, 6:01 am

Summer_Twilight wrote:
@Hero:

I was your age when I was lived with my roommates who 6 and 8 years older than I was. Though I never disclosed my diagnosis to them, they knew something was off. They were impatient with me.

However, who in here has ever been guilty of reversed bullying? That is where you fight back at the people who bullied you first?


"Reversed bullying"? I consider that self-defense.


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DesertWoman
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25 Apr 2021, 9:41 pm

It never ends. It might get a little better for brief periods, but until there is more legislation and awareness, autistic people will continue to miss out on life.



DesertWoman
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29 Apr 2021, 10:37 pm

Every single day. All day long. Nobody cares.