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xxZeromancerlovexx
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02 Jun 2021, 2:19 pm

As I’ve gotten into my late 20s I’ve noticed that my female friends I went to high school with are turning more girly and I’m becoming more tomboyish. When I wear dresses I feel like I’m wearing a costume. I only wear eye makeup and while I do love clothes, I prefer tunics and pants to super prissy outfits.

It just feels so strange.


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Lost_dragon
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02 Jun 2021, 8:18 pm

I went in the opposite direction - avoiding anything girly when in high school and then embracing it later in my late teens and now my early 20's. Yet I do somewhat relate to it feeling like a costume. Some days I am happy to wear a dress and it feels right but there are other days where I put one on and it just feels off. The only make-up I like to wear is nail polish.

As for my high school friends, I don't keep in touch. High school was a nightmare and as far as I'm concerned my life didn't truly start until I left.

I think that it's normal for a person's style, interests or overall self-presentation in general to gradually develop over time, there is often a lot of focus on drastic changes or 'glow ups' in society, but I wouldn't worry about that too much. A change doesn't have to be drastic to be impactful and noteworthy.

Just do what feels right I suppose, cliché as it sounds.


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xxZeromancerlovexx
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02 Jun 2021, 8:44 pm

Lost_dragon wrote:
I went in the opposite direction - avoiding anything girly when in high school and then embracing it later in my late teens and now my early 20's. Yet I do somewhat relate to it feeling like a costume. Some days I am happy to wear a dress and it feels right but there are other days where I put one on and it just feels off. The only make-up I like to wear is nail polish.

As for my high school friends, I don't keep in touch. High school was a nightmare and as far as I'm concerned my life didn't truly start until I left.

I think that it's normal for a person's style, interests or overall self-presentation in general to gradually develop over time, there is often a lot of focus on drastic changes or 'glow ups' in society, but I wouldn't worry about that too much. A change doesn't have to be drastic to be impactful and noteworthy.

Just do what feels right I suppose, cliché as it sounds.


The whole glow up thing drives me up the wall. If someone wants to “glow up” I don’t care. I don’t think it’s necessary though. I basically like the same things I did in high school.

Not to mention my female friends are all moms now. I can’t have kids and haven’t wanted them since I was 8 years old. I have male friends but one of them compliments on how I got a haircut even if I haven’t done anything to it! Yup......I have nothing else better to do than get haircuts :lol:


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Lost_dragon
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03 Jun 2021, 6:22 am

xxZeromancerlovexx wrote:
The whole glow up thing drives me up the wall. If someone wants to “glow up” I don’t care. I don’t think it’s necessary though.


I used to be so fixated on it as a teenager, I felt like I had to change drastically in some manner and that there was something wrong with me for not feeling comfortable in doing so. To the point of practically writing essays on other forums on the subject. I was so worried about being boring and not developing as person, when in reality I was developing, but did not feel comfortable in expressing myself and my teenage apathy was preventing me from exploring new ideas.

For me, there was a fear of always feeling disconnected from my sense of self. I felt like I was living but not living my life. A lot of teen movies are actually about milestones more common in your twenties, but university isn't as marketable as a high school setting. I always felt insecure about not looking like these twenty-somethings actors who seemed to know who they are when I certainly didn't have a clue. Everyone has a different timeline.

xxZeromancerlovexx wrote:
I basically like the same things I did in high school.


I share a couple of interests with my high school self, but I think that a lot of my interests were discovered after high school. Mainly because I was in a better environment and felt less depressed, so I suddenly had a lot more interest in life in general. Plus, I discovered that subjects I used to hate (such as history) were interesting when I learnt more about the stories behind events rather than just trying to remember the dates and statistics.

xxZeromancerlovexx wrote:
Not to mention my female friends are all moms now. I can’t have kids and haven’t wanted them since I was 8 years old. I have male friends but one of them compliments on how I got a haircut even if I haven’t done anything to it! Yup......I have nothing else better to do than get haircuts :lol:


I have a mixture of male and female friends. Can't say I've ever received a compliment on a haircut I haven't had though, that's a new one. :lol:


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SharonB
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08 Jun 2021, 12:08 am

As a child I was fairly neutral (not girly or tomboy). I went tomboyish in my 20s (men's sports jacket, plaid flannel shirts). Went feminine in my 30s (nylon tops, skirts). Still no make up or fancy hairdo. Good luck finding your style! Plenty of time to try different ones.



Juliette
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11 Jun 2021, 6:17 pm

As a child, I was very feminine in that I loved and can still remember the dresses my Mother sewed for me when ai was 3yrs. Now, I still love dresses and very feminine clothes, but because I moved from a semi-tropical climate in Australia to England, I wear mostly jeans/long pants with feminine blouses/tops in the Winter. Come the Summer, I cannot wait to wear feminine dresses again!