Question if I am stupid for being learning disabled.

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FranzOren
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29 Jun 2021, 6:54 pm

I don't know how to do basic math. Does that mean that I am stupid? I feel very depressed.



Mountain Goat
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29 Jun 2021, 7:16 pm

You may not be good at maths, but you may be blessed in other ways instead. I learned that life and greatness is about what we do with what we have and not about how much we have.
Did you know that qualities like kindness and generosity are far more important in life then ones ability to do maths or other complicated things? You can change lives by being kind.

Concentrate and develop what you can do. Leave the rest for others who have those tallents, and do not feel bad about it. Everyone is different and that is ok. Enjoy being just the person who you are meant to be. You!



FranzOren
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29 Jun 2021, 7:23 pm

I am sorry, I felt stupid and worthless when I have been made fun of and called "Stupid" for not being like them when I was in elementary school. I also am sorry for having some ableist thoughts about people with Intellectual Disability. I felt so ashamed of myself for being learning disabled that I made my own fantasies of success, intelligence, worth, beauty and power. I also had a delusion that I was much better than everyone else, that I made fun of people who did not think like me when I was fifteen years old.

I feel ashamed of myself, I know two wrongs don't make it right, but I also have been bullied for being different, so I thought I should be much smarter and superior to people with Intellectual Disability and sometimes make fun of them if they don't think like me.

I suffered a lot as well.



FranzOren
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29 Jun 2021, 7:28 pm

But, hey. Thank you! I really needed this help.



Mountain Goat
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29 Jun 2021, 7:32 pm

We can't change the past but we can move on now that we have experience. We learn from our past and that is a good thing.

Now our future we can do something with. Somethings will happen anyway, but generally we can do some things by planning now.

Dreams and goals... First make them realistic. Things we can do. I know of a certain lady who is enjoying building a model railway. She plans what she wants to build and she makes it and she is learning new skills along the way. For her that is realistic because she is using and developing the skills she has.

Some may want to go on an adventure. Explore the great outdoors!

Lots of things that are possible. Some things we may not be able to do but we can work round them. :)



Mountain Goat
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29 Jun 2021, 7:36 pm

And think of this... Think of someone who has made a model railway. They want to share what they have made. Just by enjoying looking at it, you can have made their day.

That is just one example of how doing something simple can make such a difference to someone elses life. Encouraging others is being a blessing, and this does not take great effort... But it makes such a difference. You can be an encourager today! (And it does not have to be a model railway. People make all sorts of things where you can say "Wow. Well done!")



Last edited by Mountain Goat on 29 Jun 2021, 7:37 pm, edited 1 time in total.

FranzOren
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29 Jun 2021, 7:36 pm

Thank you!



Mountain Goat
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29 Jun 2021, 7:38 pm

You are welcome.



ToughDiamond
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29 Jun 2021, 11:10 pm

I use the word "stupid" myself sometimes, but objectively I'm pretty sure there's no such thing. Different people have aptitudes for different kinds of task, is all. I'm not stupid, but I can't learn much at all in a conventional classroom setting, and even under ideal conditions I'm a slow learner. But if a subject interests me enough and I put in a lot of time and effort, I usually get there if I can get my hands on the information I need and it's presented clearly. It took me a few years to realise I didn't have brain damage.



FranzOren
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30 Jun 2021, 12:24 am

Thank you!



firemonkey
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30 Jun 2021, 6:23 am

^ I have never been good at geometry/mental rotation/struggle with practical tasks/have a poor visual memory . In more than a few ways I could be seen as 'stupid'/can think I'm stupid. I'm not stupid, and neither are you.


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FranzOren
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30 Jun 2021, 7:55 am

Thank you!



CockneyRebel
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02 Jul 2021, 8:04 am

I'm not very good at math, either. I also don't think that you're stupid. I think you're very smart.


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FranzOren
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02 Jul 2021, 8:14 am

Thank you!



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02 Jul 2021, 11:08 pm

One thing I regret is that I spent my life trying to "fix" my weaknesses instead of focusing on strengths. Yes it is good that now I can get along with NTs but.... I've put decades of effort into it and for what? Just so that I am "less abnormal"? "More average"? Was it worth it?

I am envious of those AS who didn't give a sh*t about what others say and just did what they do best, and became exceptional.

So, find something you are good at, and focus on excelling at it.



FranzOren
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02 Jul 2021, 11:18 pm

Thank you!