Why do some women get mad that you have only been sexually

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XFilesGeek
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02 Jul 2021, 7:53 pm

Fnord wrote:
XFilesGeek wrote:
... It's a troll.
Moi?


Not you.

Shadow's obvious, whiney misogyny marks him as a troll.


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02 Jul 2021, 7:55 pm

QFT wrote:
The OP doesn't sound like the women are being mad over her wearing or not wearing certain clothes. It, instead, sounds like the woman are mad at her over the fact that she wasn't sexually harassed as much as they were. And this is so twisted. Its like being mad at someone for the fact that they "weren't" robbed, or "didn't" get a cancer. Doesn't it strike you as ill-wishing?

The only way to make sense of this is maybe being rape victim is something women bond over? So they "want" their sisters to be rape victims and that way they can "bond" with them over it? I heard the other day how there was a group of women trying to lose weight and one of them was more successful at weight loss than the others were, and then they got mad at that woman for the fact that she did so well.

Now, the other aspect of "bonding over being a rape victim" is the following. I read the other day, in a different context, that social groups aren't just defined by who "is" welcome but also by who "isn't". Now, the most obvious consequence of being a rape victim is lack of trust towards men -- either all men or some specific kind of men. So could it be that the woman that "wasn't" raped has failed to "exclude" the males/ specific kind of males from her life and, consequently, has failed to be "included" into that group?

As far as "specific kind of men" if you are talking about male rapists, that is fair and square. The problem is that the "red flags" that they are looking for are often misplaced. For example, male aspies are often being viewed of as potential rapists even though it would never cross their mind to do that. While the actual rapists are often going under the radar because they are such a smooth talkers. And this brings me to the point I was trying to make. Could it be that the women are trying to exclude male aspies and then they got mad at OP for the fact that she won't exclude them since she haven't had the experience that made the rest of them do that?



This makes perfect sense. Bitter because I didn't get harassed as much as that woman. Bitter because it never happened to me in regular clothes other than when I was pregnant.

This was on Reddit outside of autism subs. There were no male aspies or rapists involved in the scenario. Just that women who reposted a AITA thread to amithedevil and it was about a man who told his wife to wear different pants to avoid unwanted attention. She got mad and told him it was misogynistic to say it. He got upset and made that thread.


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02 Jul 2021, 7:56 pm

League_Girl wrote:
funeralxempire wrote:
Shadow1888 wrote:
A sex worker is a sex worker. Their is no excuse to sell yourself. So my point, lack of self respect.


Paying the bills seems like a reasonable excuse.
Enjoying the work seems like a great excuse.

Not that one needs an excuse for finding work they enjoy (assuming their participation is voluntary).



Luckily I only do it as a hobby and decided to use that money for my face. Botox and fillers.

I wouldn't do it for a living only because it would be hard work. I am sure if I was desperate for money if I had lost my job, I would try and put more effort into it while looking for a new job.


Well still, nice to have a hobby you can make a little money on the side with, and potentially fall back on for a bit if you needed to look for a new job. Quite self respectable if you ask me.


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02 Jul 2021, 8:00 pm

XFilesGeek wrote:
Fnord wrote:
XFilesGeek wrote:
... It's a troll.
Moi?


Not you.

Shadow's obvious, whiney misogyny marks him as a troll.


I don't believe he's an intentional troll, fwiw. Just tone-deaf and fixated on trying to explain us into agreeing that blatant misogyny isn't misogyny. We just don't get it, he doesn't hate women, just the ones who are this misogynistic insult or that misogynistic insult.

We've had a lot of posters like this over the years and when/if they become popular regulars they get defended but when they're only occasional posters like Shadow they get called out for it because it's the only interaction anyone's had with them.

I'm not saying posters like that shouldn't be treated as trolls, only that there needs to be consistency with how wrong, tonedeaf shit-disturbers are treated.


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02 Jul 2021, 8:01 pm

XFilesGeek wrote:
Shadow's obvious, whiney misogyny marks him as a troll.


I thought he was just being honest and standing up for himself, kind of a Scots thing?



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02 Jul 2021, 8:04 pm

MrsPeel wrote:
XFilesGeek wrote:
Shadow's obvious, whiney misogyny marks him as a troll.


I thought he was just being honest and standing up for himself, kind of a Scots thing?


And autistic thing.

But, while he's probably not intentionally trolling, it's not unfair to describe him as a troll. At this point it's clear his argument isn't persuasive and extending the conflict isn't benefiting his cause but is deliberate and is disruptive. That's a pretty fair standard to call someone a troll whether or not it's a fair standard to punish that person for trolling.

I don't believe he's engaging in actionable behaviour, but neither has XFG, it's not name-calling to call someone who's acting like a troll a troll.


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Last edited by funeralxempire on 02 Jul 2021, 8:05 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Sweetleaf
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02 Jul 2021, 8:05 pm

funeralxempire wrote:
XFilesGeek wrote:
Fnord wrote:
XFilesGeek wrote:
... It's a troll.
Moi?


Not you.

Shadow's obvious, whiney misogyny marks him as a troll.


I don't believe he's an intentional troll, fwiw. Just tone-deaf and fixated on trying to explain us into agreeing that blatant misogyny isn't misogyny. We just don't get it, he doesn't hate women, just the ones who are this misogynistic insult or that misogynistic insult.

We've had a lot of posters like this over the years and when/if they become popular regulars they get defended but when they're only occasional posters like Shadow they get called out for it because it's the only interaction anyone's had with them.

I'm not saying posters like that shouldn't be treated as trolls, only that there needs to be consistency with how wrong, tonedeaf shit-disturbers are treated.


That is the impression I was getting as well.


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02 Jul 2021, 8:12 pm

funeralxempire wrote:
XFilesGeek wrote:
Fnord wrote:
XFilesGeek wrote:
... It's a troll.
Moi?


Not you.

Shadow's obvious, whiney misogyny marks him as a troll.


I don't believe he's an intentional troll, fwiw. Just tone-deaf and fixated on trying to explain us into agreeing that blatant misogyny isn't misogyny. We just don't get it, he doesn't hate women, just the ones who are this misogynistic insult or that misogynistic insult.

We've had a lot of posters like this over the years and when/if they become popular regulars they get defended but when they're only occasional posters like Shadow they get called out for it because it's the only interaction anyone's had with them.

I'm not saying posters like that shouldn't be treated as trolls, only that there needs to be consistency with how wrong, tonedeaf shit-disturbers are treated.


A good point, but I've had my fill of him and his ilk.

Also, if it walks like a duck.....well, you know the rest. My charity towards hateful, misogynistic men is spent


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Sweetleaf
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02 Jul 2021, 10:12 pm

XFilesGeek wrote:
funeralxempire wrote:
XFilesGeek wrote:
Fnord wrote:
XFilesGeek wrote:
... It's a troll.
Moi?


Not you.

Shadow's obvious, whiney misogyny marks him as a troll.


I don't believe he's an intentional troll, fwiw. Just tone-deaf and fixated on trying to explain us into agreeing that blatant misogyny isn't misogyny. We just don't get it, he doesn't hate women, just the ones who are this misogynistic insult or that misogynistic insult.

We've had a lot of posters like this over the years and when/if they become popular regulars they get defended but when they're only occasional posters like Shadow they get called out for it because it's the only interaction anyone's had with them.

I'm not saying posters like that shouldn't be treated as trolls, only that there needs to be consistency with how wrong, tonedeaf shit-disturbers are treated.


A good point, but I've had my fill of him and his ilk.

Also, if it walks like a duck.....well, you know the rest. My charity towards hateful, misogynistic men is spent


Yeah you're right. Whether intentional troll or not they were being an ass and did not seem interested in even considering what people here had to say.


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02 Jul 2021, 10:20 pm

XFilesGeek wrote:
My charity towards hateful, misogynistic men is spent


Completely understood. Image


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03 Jul 2021, 3:31 am

But also to reiterate, a real woman is any woman...there is no 'real woman' mold...You can be whatever sort of woman you want to be.


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03 Jul 2021, 4:01 am

Sweetleaf wrote:
But also to reiterate, a real woman is any woman...there is no 'real woman' mold...You can be whatever sort of woman you want to be.




Agreed. There's no such thing as a "stereotypical woman" and no one should expect them to behave in presumed or predictable ways. They should be treated as individuals. They remain a mystery to most of us... and that will probably remain so!


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03 Jul 2021, 6:05 am

Shadow1888 is no longer contributing to WP.

Quote:
You sound like your view is entirely based on misogynistic tropes with utterly no experience interacting with actual women.
Yeah, this right here.


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04 Jul 2021, 5:03 pm

Back to the original question:

League_Girl wrote:
Only time I have ever gotten unwanted attention from men was when I was showing my body like wearing a tank top, short shorts or just wear a sports bra and short shorts.

...

But I notice this seems to make some women angry so I get downvoted and someone telling me f**k you on reddit.

Why this would make some women angry would depend on the specifics of (1) exactly how you phrased it, (2) exactly what you were replying to, and (3) what general kind of culture the women replying to you belong to.

Perhaps you inadvertantly came across to them as judging other women for wearing revealing clothes?


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05 Jul 2021, 12:14 am

Mona Pereth wrote:
Back to the original question:

League_Girl wrote:
Only time I have ever gotten unwanted attention from men was when I was showing my body like wearing a tank top, short shorts or just wear a sports bra and short shorts.

...

But I notice this seems to make some women angry so I get downvoted and someone telling me f**k you on reddit.

Why this would make some women angry would depend on the specifics of (1) exactly how you phrased it, (2) exactly what you were replying to, and (3) what general kind of culture the women replying to you belong to.

Perhaps you inadvertantly came across to them as judging other women for wearing revealing clothes?



But a woman has every right to wear what she feels comfortable in without a man harassing her as I said in my Reddit post. So I have been slut shamed. QFT's post made perfect sense.

I answered the rest of the questions in this thread already. It was response to a man wondering if he was an as*hole for telling his wife to wear different pants because she liked to wear these tight leggings that showed her figure and she was feeling unsafe due to unwanted attention she was getting from men.


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