Page 2 of 2 [ 18 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2


User avatar

Joined: 23 Feb 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 20,770
Location: South-East England

29 Jul 2021, 5:18 pm

Summer_Twilight wrote:
I think some examples:

1. If a colleague invites everyone but you out to lunch or to a party at their house -
2. If you live near family members who have decided they don't want you over and even if it's the holidays

He is suggesting that you don't need to confront these people or convince them otherwise because chances are there is a reason you are not meant to be with them because they maybe engaging in activities that could get you into trouble later on.

I know what he is talking about, I was rejected by people who I thought were great but they turned out to be people who
1. Lie all the time
2. Engage in criminal activity
3. Use drugs

Usually the answer to that is cliqueness. A couple of years ago at work there were 5 people my age (4 guys and 2 girls) and they often did things at the weekends but never invited me, even if I hinted that I was interested in some of the things they were doing. It did hurt me inside and made me not want to work with them any more because all they did was make these arrangements in front of me and then chat about it after the event, and I just couldn't help but feel left out. It's hard to deal with when you're naturally a sociable person and you're good at masking and you show that you enjoy being around others.

Aged 31
On antidepressants
Have ASD, ADHD and anxiety disorder
Empathy score: 61 out of a possible 80. (High)


User avatar

Joined: 13 Sep 2011
Age: 39
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,140

03 Aug 2021, 2:09 pm

There are also the type of people who are not cliquey and will dislike you for whatever and sometimes no reason.

For example, I used to be friends with another woman who was on the moderate end of the spectrum who's mother was overly protective of her. For whatever reason she didn't like me and was very rude and condescending with me on several occasions.

For instance, she often seemed to drop a hint that I am a selfish person by letting me know when it was someone else's turn to have a special day or celebration. I tried to be as nice to her a possible but I woke up one day and realized that was never going to happen.