Having my period feels extremely overwhelming

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Crystal1414
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20 Aug 2021, 12:37 pm

Every time I find out I am on my period, I feel upset. I never know when I am supposed to get it and sometimes I do not realize that I am getting cramps because of my period. Then it just comes as a shock. My mom wants me to track it, just so that I can be prepared.

The cramps are hard to deal with. I also get bad mood swings and more anger. I hate the feeling of having to use tampons because I am scared of toxic shock syndrome. My mom and sister use tampons. I also feel like I do not have a lot of privacy in my life when it comes to this. I feel like my parents hate when I get my period. I sort of make a mess by accident because I struggle with managing it. Is there any way to make it feel less overwhelming?



Sweetleaf
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20 Aug 2021, 2:25 pm

Tracking it might be a good idea, since then maybe you could be more prepared for it.

Also, if your worried about tampons, you could maybe use pads instead or at least alternate between the two.



professorkiki33
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20 Aug 2021, 6:29 pm

Tracking it via apps is important. They may have a monthly or yearly subscription cost, just do it and consider it a cost required to be comfortable. The app allows you to document your experience, each day of your period, the lightness or heaviness of your flow, etc and will prompt you when the algorithm of the app detects your period may be coming.

As a woman, you are free to treat your period however you wish - don't get sucked into peer pressure by the other women around you, find what is comfortable and go with that.

I suggest you use organic cotton pads, they can be found at the drugstore. Tampons are dangerous only because you may a) forget to take them out and b) microscopic (or even sometimes larger) fibers can be left inside of you and it's not healthy. There are also period underwear, and they are a bit pricey, but very easy to manage since they act like regular underwear, link attached here: https://www.shethinx.com/

Another issue is diet - diet affects everything. Diet affects your mood, your ability to process and problem solve, the thoughts that flow through your mind, and how your body physiologically reacts to its own internal processes and external triggers. What does that mean? That means if you're not eating healthy, your cycle (amongst other things) will suffer. If you eat a lot of junk food or sweet treats leading up to and during your period, your pain will be increased and your flow will be heavier. At least during your period, please eat healthy, avoid sweet treats and junk food and opt for whole foods such as organic fruits, vegetables, salads, beans, complex whole grains/seeds (quinoa, brown rice), and lean protein white meats (chicken or fish).

I also suggest expressing your feelings to your family. "Hi family, I'd like to talk about the struggles I go through when I have my period and would like you to be more understanding of my emotional needs - please do not get upset me when I have it, please do not get upset at the mess I may make, this body is new to me and I'm trying my best so please understand and do your best to make the situation comfortable, and I'll do the same. Here is what I'm going to do to make the experience better: get a period tracker to become more aware of my cycle, using feminine hygiene products that feel good to my body, eating extra healthy on my period to regulate my mood"

I hope everything works out for you :)


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SharonB
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20 Aug 2021, 6:42 pm

Sorry it's a pain (literally). Mine were awful. Something fierce. I used heating pads to cope. The pain decreased in time and now I don't have any (just mild discomfort at the very onset.)

My periods weren't regular to begin with so it was a crapshoot. When they did become regular it made it easier to prepare. Even so, the length and flow have changed over the decades so I still end up with underwear (or pants) soaking in a bucket. I accept that's my lot in life (have grace for ourselves). When I finally learned the signs of ovulation and that my period comes exactly 11 to 12 days afterward (for most people it's 14 days) that it made things that much easier.

As far as moods, yes, all that. I learned though that when I ovulate my mood is better and I am more social and that's beneficial to me as an Autistic person. So at the time of my period there is the downside (significant depression/angst) and at the time of ovulation there's the upside (significant social motivation). So it's not all bad. I give my husband a heads up when my period is due in 3 to 4 days. Sometimes I forget and when I'm in that bad mood he'll **gently** (kindly) remind me it could be that and will pass (hang in there).

I also worry about TSS and of the 1,000s of tampons I have used, I have had half a dozen instances in the past 30 years in which I forgot a tampon for nearly a day (usually on the last day b/c otherwise overflow would notify me): and it's been fine. I'm still diligent, but not angsty about it.

Wishing you can find grace for yourself (and that your family does also) and that it goes more smoothly for you.



bob.kebob
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22 Aug 2021, 7:34 am

I had similar issues, very heavy and irregular periods and tampons make my cramps unbearable. I talked to my gynecologist and they gave me birth control, it helps a lot and I get my period less often. Maybe you could talk to a gynecologist and see what they think. Hope things get better soon!



y-pod
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24 Aug 2021, 5:32 am

I usually just put a mark on a calendar when I get my period, and when it ends. When I take down the calendar at the end of a year I'll record the data in a little book I kept since menarche. I was determined that I would count every one of them. :) I'm not very good at remembering unimportant things like these, unless I take notes.

My periods are heavy and awful. Each time was like a bout of illness. I survive through them by thinking that soon I'll be free. I'm 49 now and would rather not take any birth controls. I plan my activities to give myself at least two days off during a period. I don't cook, do laundry, call people or even eat meals with my family. Not having to put a face on for the world helped a lot. The three guys in my house are quite afraid of my periods and usually very understanding. If I have to do stuff I'll take Advil. It's rather a last resort thing because it makes me furiously hot, and I really hate that. I hope you find a solution to cope with yours.


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