How did your school PTA meets go?

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Joined: 31 Jan 2011
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28 Oct 2021, 1:24 pm

Thinking about parent-teacher interview nights... how were yours?
As a later Gen-X'r born in the mid-1970s, and in school before Asperger's was known... they just chalked it up to ADHD combined with social anxiety. My reports - both report cards and teacher meetings - said these sorts of things:

"Acts silly to get attention in class."
"Needs to focus more on what is being asked, so he can complete assignments correctly."
"Jayo does not have any friends in the class." (of course, the onus is entirely on me, right?? :roll: :x )
"Jayo seems very nervous in class."

The last one was in Grade 10, after I moved schools from a really bad Grade 9 experience (constant bullying) which resulted in what I know now to be moderate PTSD, which lasted a while after.

For the repeating comment I got about needing to complete assignments correctly according to what's expected, I think that was due to the ADHD co-morbid condition, combined with impairments in executive function and ToM combined with central coherence. Clearly, it wasn't based on any lack of non-verbal communication fluency or understanding of social norms. But on that note, the funny thing was I never ONCE had a teacher say on my report card or parent-teacher interview that I didn't seem to understand non-verbal communication. I suppose this is because teachers will typically be more direct and factual in their interactions with you; you don't have to decode any sarcasm, or false flattery, or subtle rejection, etc., etc. that you would otherwise get from peers. If they're annoyed with you or disappointed with you in some way, they'll verbally tell you so (not being overly aggressive, more indignant in a way) - not like later in post-secondary when peers would sort of turn away from me, or cast negative glances at each other, or scoff under their breath, etc. And because I didn't meet the "minimum passmark" to interact with my teen peers when it mattered, I didn't have that socio-emotional experience to take with me into the 20s.


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28 Oct 2021, 1:31 pm

I don't remember my parents ever going to them.

My reports all talked about ASD / ADHD behaviours but I had good grades, so that's all anyone cared about.


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28 Oct 2021, 1:44 pm

"Hurtloam is very quiet, needs to participate more."


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28 Oct 2021, 1:52 pm

The teacher reports usually said:
1. I talked too much (to my friends)
2. I didn't do well in groups
3. I got frustrated easily
4. I didn't stay in my seat or stay still and I fidgeted a lot (one of my teachers dumped everything out of my desk and made me get my things out of a tub at the back of the class over it)
5. I didn't pay attention to my work that well and didn't finish it fast enough



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31 Oct 2021, 1:16 pm

1. Needs to read and practice writing more.
2. Needs to talk and socialize more.
3. Needs to calm down her temper and ignore them bullies and stop being so violent.
4. Sleeps at classes. :lol: Eats at classes.
5. Does not start or cause trouble -- is well behaved enough to not noisy or stands up in classes. But is easily provoked into it. See #3 and #2.
6. Needs to use polite words more often.
7. Walks out of class.
8. Sometimes threaten other classmates with more violence. See #3 and #5. Or did commit violence.
9. Underachieving. Bright but does not take classes seriously.
10. Breaks plenty of items and some properties.
11. Stares and draws at classes even if she finishes all written lectures and activities correctly first.
12. Does not cooperate or/and communicate with groupmates in group activities. See #2.

Half the time, the lack of communicating and socializing is at least partially ignored.
It's usually overshadowed by my reactivity against bullies.

Sometimes sleeping and eating in classes are ignored because I actually do well in classes at the same time.
They're too focused to the idea that I'm bright and as to why I didn't took studies seriously when I could've easily get honors.

Not sure what else my mom or I could remember.

And there are more, usually about leaving me alone and let me do things my own.

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