Page 1 of 1 [ 7 posts ] 

Angnix
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 1 Nov 2007
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,206
Location: Michigan

29 Nov 2021, 6:38 pm

I'm my new Pokemon community, I'm playing the games so much I'm discovering new things... But people keep shooting me down.

I discovered a new Shiny Hunting Method in Sword and Shield and was told "I was just lucky"
Months later, they discovered it was true...

In the remakes Brilliant Diamond and Shining Pearl, they found a handy glitch but noted it didn't always work... I played around with it, explained how to make it work every single time, did people listen, no...

Just now I saw a suggestion by a guy on another forum on how to make Shiny Hunting easier and everyone's like "That's Great!" I thought of a way to improve upon it and the reaction was everyone pointing out potential problems, though the other guys method was basically the same, I just thought of a way to twerk it...

Why am I being so disrespected in this community? I keep thinking it's because I'm female? I just don't get it...


_________________
Crazy Bird Lady!! !
Also likes Pokemon

Avatar: A Shiny from the new Pokemon Pearl remake, Shiny Chatot... I named him TaterTot...

FINALLY diagnosed with ASD 2/6/2020


katzhutte
Blue Jay
Blue Jay

User avatar

Joined: 27 Nov 2021
Age: 43
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 99

29 Nov 2021, 6:50 pm

Angnix wrote:

Why am I being so disrespected in this community? I keep thinking it's because I'm female? I just don't get it...


Who can say for sure but there are a subset of male gamers who have a dislike for female gamers so it's always a possibility it's your gender.



shlaifu
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 May 2014
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,284

29 Nov 2021, 7:19 pm

make videos of how you're doing some special thing, repeatedly.
If you tell people, they try, they do something wrong, they blame you and call you a bullshitter.
Show them mysterious mastery instead, and wait for them to ask you to explain it.

that probably goes for everything in life.


_________________
I can read facial expressions. I did the test.


enz
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 26 Sep 2015
Posts: 950

29 Nov 2021, 8:01 pm

sign up without stating gender and if they give you praise say tell them your a female gamer but not in a way they could say your asking for attention



kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 79,430
Location: Queens, NYC

30 Nov 2021, 8:54 am

People who spend a lot of time playing video games as adults tend to have an extended adolescence.

Not talking about you. I'm talking about the other gamers. They still haven't let go of high school.



Fireblossom
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 18 Jan 2017
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,172

30 Nov 2021, 10:28 am

I hear it's a common problem for female gamers to be belittled for their gender, so it's possible. Another possibility is that it's not because you're a woman but because it's you, as in that gamer community dislikes you as a person for one reason or the other. Then there's also a chance that those people who've gotten praise for the same things you've said first are popular and would get praise no matter what they said.



AngelRho
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Jan 2008
Age: 43
Gender: Male
Posts: 8,745
Location: The Landmass between N.O. and Mobile

30 Nov 2021, 12:21 pm

I'm not into online gaming. But I think as a general rule, the male/female dichotomy is an identity issue. The solution is to just not identify, because the true issue is you are a 1) gamer and 2) good at it. So let those two things be your identity, not your gender.

It's not just a gaming thing. The idea of women being inferior is as old as time. I mean...honestly, I'm a cis-gendered, hetero male who just likes playing campaigns/story mode--and I actually PREFER playing as a female character. My understanding is in the online gaming world there are tons of guys out there that are masculine IRL and prefer playing as female, and plenty of girls play as male characters. I see nothing wrong with that. However, there seems to be this confusion that a girl character is actually a girl gamer, and male gamers behave differently towards these characters regardless of the actual faces behind these characters--assuming them to be actual girls and being surprised when they don't, pardon the stereotype, "play like a girl."

There is nothing at all wrong with being a female gamer, even if the gaming community as a whole is lopsided. You have the ability approach this community with the awareness that it is lopsided. I can't compete with you on the gender issue because I'm male, but I can TOTALLY relate to this phenomenon that any time I say something, it's perfectly ignorable or trash. But when the next guy says it, it's pure gold. And so that lets me know I'm way ahead of the game. So ONE way I tend to look at it is that being a better, say, musician or teacher, if I'm trying to give away advice for free and nobody wants it from me, then it's really not worth anything to them. And if they are trampling my pearls, then they don't deserve them. If you have in the past begun to see yourself as a victim, I hope you don't continue to view it that way. Instead, think of it differently. The prevailing "masculine" attitude is that women don't belong, right? Make me a sammitch, right? Fine. If they just expect you to keep your eyes down and mouth shut, give them exactly what they want and expect. Don't offer anything. By your actions, demonstrate your knowledge and ability simply by being a better gamer than everyone else. No, I'm not making assumptions about your level of ability. I just mean when you consistently perform better than anyone at your level, you owe them nothing in regard to your gameplay secrets. I was always ahead of my peers musically, and I just never could get people to take me seriously. So I just quit helping people. Everyone expects their turn at whatever game they're playing, but the truth is nobody owes you anything. And you don't owe anybody anything, either. So whatever it is you do, if you hear someone complaining about a problem, use that against them. Fix the problem, outperform, be consistent, and don't bother trying to help people. And if you know some deep, dark, secret, and someone comes begging for advice, there dang well better be money involved.

I'm approaching my mid-40's, so yeah...I'm old. My kids have discovered my old Xbox and enjoy playing the same games I enjoyed 10+ years ago, especially the first Gears of War trilogy. There's a chapter in Gears 2 where the main character has to shoot mortars out of the sky, shoot down a Reaver, and then take out a Brumak. Taking out the mortars isn't easy, and I always play on Insane mode. I figured out that the mortars follow a consistent pattern every time I play, and the first mortar crosses in front of a cloud at a specific point on the screen. Point gun, fire at that spot, and just wait for the mortar to run into your bullets. Using a similar trick, I learned how to effortlessly lead the mortars and take them out without directly aiming for the mortars themselves. The rest of that scene follows a similar general pattern and becomes predictable. My oldest son had been frequently frustrated just playing in normal and hardcore mode, so I gave him advice on how to beat it. He kept insisting my method DID NOT WORK. Because, you know, Dad is OLD and doesn't know ANYTHING. So I smiled at him, took his controller away, and said "watch this." Boom. Boom. Boom... DONE. "Now, let's restart the checkpoint and you try it." He didn't get it perfect, but he at least passed the checkpoint. Obviously, you can't do this with gamers you encounter, and that's not really my point. People have to be SHOWN and persuaded that you are right, and this typically won't happen before someone ends up terribly frustrated over what really amounts to be nothing. So all you can do is consistently outperform and leave people asking, "how did she do it?" And by staying on top of things, you'll earn much respect. You don't need respect, you don't want respect. But you will get it. And that's when people will look at you as a gamer, not a "girl gamer," same as how my kid thinks I'm some sort of genius for how I handle campaigns in GOW. No, I'm really not very good. But I'm willing to experiment, play on Insane, die on just one checkpoint upwards of 2 hours and sometimes more at a stretch if that's what it takes, and come back understanding the game on a higher level. I'd really like for my own kids to begin looking at life as a whole that way--fail forward, outperform their peers, earn respect. And that requires taking a ton of risks, getting knocked down repeatedly until you can't get knocked down anymore, and moving forward.