Being good at at most social skills, with ASD.

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Lady Strange
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10 May 2022, 6:09 pm

techstepgenr8tion wrote:
I thankfully haven't needed to overtly lie to people much because I've mostly been dealing with the status-checking games rather than probing.

I do have compartments in my life - some I can share with others, some are easier online (such as here) because there are very few people who will ever meet me face to face, at the same time there are contents of my life that are 'nobody's business' in face-to-face life, mainly because - lets face it - the NT world isn't about clearing up misunderstandings, misunderstandings are things you weaponize and leverage to extort people, make power-grabs on people you don't like, and since anything on the table is there to be weaponized for the gene war there's just a lot that I don't put on the table because I understand that the point of discussion isn't about life, living, learning new things, being human, and sharing what we've learned (you can find some of that with very selected company but for the most part no - it's about status poaching and mugging).


That is a good way to put it, compartmentalize with people. You do have to be very careful what you share. I wish more people were about learning new things and sharing the learning but I too have found it to be more rare and it is sad. I call it knowledge hording, what people do when they want power over someone else or feel superior to them by refusing or not wanting to share the wealth of knowledge.



FranzOren
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10 May 2022, 6:18 pm

I agree!



Pepe
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11 May 2022, 7:07 pm

FranzOren wrote:
I know that most people with ASD have hard time being good at deception and charm, but people like me are different.


I am organising for you to be ostracised from the autistic community.
Joke, of course.


FranzOren wrote:
I became good at being charm and deceptive. When I deceive people, they don't know that I am lying, even when I laugh after, because I use charm.


Since I am "The Oracle of Truth", I have reconsidered and will organise your extradition out of our community.
Consider yourself "Cancelled".
Also a joke, obviously.


FranzOren wrote:
I am developed some NT social skills, such as lying, charm, manipulating, tricking and brainwashing. I know this is strange, because I have ASD, but I don't fit the stereotype and exact diagnostic criteria of ASD that most people and professionals think of.


9 years ago, I was naive and thought you would have been strange regarding this.
I no longer have these childish beliefs.

"When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things."

Pepe, no longer the naive skunk. 8)


_________________
Laughter is the best medicine. Age-appropriate behaviour is an arbitrary NT social construct.
Don't tell me white lies. Gaslight me at your peril. Don't give me your bad attitude. Hypnosis, psychosis. Tomarto, tomayto. There are *4* lights. Honey badger.
If I'm so bad, pass me by. ;)


And one more thing,



Also, as George Carlin said, "I have no stake in the outcome." I'll stick around for the comedy.

"A stranger is a friend gang-stalker you haven't met yet."
Truth may be inconvenient but it is never politically incorrect...The Oracle of Truth has spoken...8)
Read my lips:-I am not a fan of the orange man.-I would never vote for the Republican party given the chance.-I am interested in being objective and rational.


Pepe
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11 May 2022, 7:18 pm

Joe90 wrote:
I can lie and I understand the concept of lying. I've even got my own mum believing I had this bloke over at my house one time (the bloke existed of course but he never came to our house), and this was when I was even younger than I am now (about 19-20). Lying is easy and can feel natural to me when I have to lie, although usually I am honest in ways where I don't like hurting people (like I would never cheat on my partner).

Also if someone badmouths to me about someone else, I automatically know not to tell that person. My instinct just says ''listen but don't tell, as it could hurt their feelings''. I just automatically get the hint that what they're saying isn't meant to be repeated.

I do actually have a lot of social skills that come naturally. But I still can't make friends that easily, which is why I get so mad about it, because it's not like I lack a lot of social skills and I know I come across as neurotypical often.


Noted. :mrgreen:
I am never comfortable with lying, except in one particular situation.

If I am disgusted by a particular person, I have no trouble lying to that creature person whatsoever.
I consider it the ultimate sign of disrespect on my part. 8)
Well, that and something I prefer not to mention. :mrgreen:


_________________
Laughter is the best medicine. Age-appropriate behaviour is an arbitrary NT social construct.
Don't tell me white lies. Gaslight me at your peril. Don't give me your bad attitude. Hypnosis, psychosis. Tomarto, tomayto. There are *4* lights. Honey badger.
If I'm so bad, pass me by. ;)


And one more thing,



Also, as George Carlin said, "I have no stake in the outcome." I'll stick around for the comedy.

"A stranger is a friend gang-stalker you haven't met yet."
Truth may be inconvenient but it is never politically incorrect...The Oracle of Truth has spoken...8)
Read my lips:-I am not a fan of the orange man.-I would never vote for the Republican party given the chance.-I am interested in being objective and rational.


Pepe
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11 May 2022, 7:28 pm

funeralxempire wrote:
I used to believe I was much more capable of being successfully manipulative and deceptive than I ever genuinely was.

I used to believe I was much more charming than I actually am too.


"Don't torture yourself..."
...That is my job, Gomez ." :mrgreen:


I thought I was extremely good at reading body language.
I am, but not in all circumstances.
I used to naively believe I could easily identify a psychopath.
Clearly, I was deluding myself.

These days, I realise a telling sign that one is communicating with a psychopath is the degree of friendliness that is spouted by the creature.
These days, alarm signals start ringing. 8O

Thankfully, I keep my trusty mallet in my back pocket in case a "Wack-a-mole" pops up. 8)


_________________
Laughter is the best medicine. Age-appropriate behaviour is an arbitrary NT social construct.
Don't tell me white lies. Gaslight me at your peril. Don't give me your bad attitude. Hypnosis, psychosis. Tomarto, tomayto. There are *4* lights. Honey badger.
If I'm so bad, pass me by. ;)


And one more thing,



Also, as George Carlin said, "I have no stake in the outcome." I'll stick around for the comedy.

"A stranger is a friend gang-stalker you haven't met yet."
Truth may be inconvenient but it is never politically incorrect...The Oracle of Truth has spoken...8)
Read my lips:-I am not a fan of the orange man.-I would never vote for the Republican party given the chance.-I am interested in being objective and rational.


Pepe
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11 May 2022, 7:35 pm

Nades wrote:
I can lie very well provided I have enough time to prepare.

If I'm put on the spot I'm a hopeless lier even worse at deception.


I find that hard to believe. 8O
That was a lie. :mrgreen:


_________________
Laughter is the best medicine. Age-appropriate behaviour is an arbitrary NT social construct.
Don't tell me white lies. Gaslight me at your peril. Don't give me your bad attitude. Hypnosis, psychosis. Tomarto, tomayto. There are *4* lights. Honey badger.
If I'm so bad, pass me by. ;)


And one more thing,



Also, as George Carlin said, "I have no stake in the outcome." I'll stick around for the comedy.

"A stranger is a friend gang-stalker you haven't met yet."
Truth may be inconvenient but it is never politically incorrect...The Oracle of Truth has spoken...8)
Read my lips:-I am not a fan of the orange man.-I would never vote for the Republican party given the chance.-I am interested in being objective and rational.


FranzOren
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11 May 2022, 8:28 pm

My man, you are funny! :D



Jayo
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11 May 2022, 8:32 pm

techstepgenr8tion wrote:
I thankfully haven't needed to overtly lie to people much because I've mostly been dealing with the status-checking games rather than probing.

I do have compartments in my life - some I can share with others, some are easier online (such as here) because there are very few people who will ever meet me face to face, at the same time there are contents of my life that are 'nobody's business' in face-to-face life, mainly because - lets face it - the NT world isn't about clearing up misunderstandings, misunderstandings are things you weaponize and leverage to extort people, make power-grabs on people you don't like, and since anything on the table is there to be weaponized for the gene war there's just a lot that I don't put on the table because I understand that the point of discussion isn't about life, living, learning new things, being human, and sharing what we've learned (you can find some of that with very selected company but for the most part no - it's about status poaching and mugging).


Ahh... I think that may be hyperbole.
What you just described sounds like a vicious, mud-slinging, no-holds-barred political campaign.
I don't think the daily vicissitudes of life are quite to that extent.
I've cleared up misunderstandings and had some cleared up for me too, and there was no apparent animosity afterwards.
Now I've got that Genesis tune in my head, "There must be some misunderstanding..." :P :D :D



FranzOren
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11 May 2022, 8:40 pm

Pepe is so funny, I don't want to die of laughter. (Figure of speech)



Pepe
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11 May 2022, 8:42 pm

FranzOren wrote:
My man, you are funny! :D


Yes, I am hilarious.
The trouble is, most don't recognise it. :mrgreen:


_________________
Laughter is the best medicine. Age-appropriate behaviour is an arbitrary NT social construct.
Don't tell me white lies. Gaslight me at your peril. Don't give me your bad attitude. Hypnosis, psychosis. Tomarto, tomayto. There are *4* lights. Honey badger.
If I'm so bad, pass me by. ;)


And one more thing,



Also, as George Carlin said, "I have no stake in the outcome." I'll stick around for the comedy.

"A stranger is a friend gang-stalker you haven't met yet."
Truth may be inconvenient but it is never politically incorrect...The Oracle of Truth has spoken...8)
Read my lips:-I am not a fan of the orange man.-I would never vote for the Republican party given the chance.-I am interested in being objective and rational.


FranzOren
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11 May 2022, 8:47 pm

Thanks! LOL!! ! :D :D :D