I dislike socialization but I crave it so badly

Page 2 of 2 [ 20 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2

spicyjelly
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

User avatar

Joined: 22 Jul 2022
Age: 26
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 8
Location: USA

26 Jul 2022, 1:21 am

klanka wrote:
I don't like group social situations at all.
When I had one-on-one time with a woman I liked , as in just talking, it was great.


I also prefer small social situations. Two other people is my maximum before I really start getting anxious.


_________________
"I'm not trapped here with you. You're trapped here with me."


Joe90
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Feb 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 24,165
Location: UK

26 Jul 2022, 10:54 am

I have the same predicament. I hate the idea of doing things like clubbing, but at the same time I get envious or upset if everybody else goes out clubbing and I'm the only one who has never been. I think the answer is that if I knew more people around me, especially in my family, that hate clubbing and have never been then I'll probably feel more comfort in not going clubbing.

Societal/peer pressure can be a very strong thing.


_________________
Female
Aged 32

Diagnosed with ADHD
Have Anxiety Disorder
Diagnosed with mild ASD but I don't identify as autistic


KitLily
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Jan 2021
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,535
Location: England

26 Jul 2022, 11:00 am

I realised a big thing about NTs recently and why they don't like 1:1 time with someone.

They think we are trying to 'get them away from their friends' so we can say nasty things about them behind their backs.

I realised a lot of people do this: they isolate one person from their friendship group to turn them against their friends. I realised this because I read a lot about narcissism and apparently that is how narcissists operate. So people assume the worst when someone tries to 'get them alone.'

This was a big shock to me. All I want to do with a 1:1 time is have a decent conversation where I can keep up with what is being said and not feel shy and awkward!


_________________
I am here for interesting, meaningful discussions and thoughtful, rewarding conversations. I very quickly lose interest in long, drawn-out arguments.
***
I'm sorry if I get you mixed up with other people, I'm not good at telling people apart. Just remind me of our last conversation then I'll know who you are.


klanka
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 31 Mar 2022
Age: 44
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,193
Location: Cardiff, Wales

26 Jul 2022, 11:05 am

spicyjelly wrote:
klanka wrote:
I don't like group social situations at all.
When I had one-on-one time with a woman I liked , as in just talking, it was great.


I also prefer small social situations. Two other people is my maximum before I really start getting anxious.

Yeah it's good, I remember spending time with two friends and that was ok too