Does my mom make a good point about this?

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Jamesy
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20 Nov 2022, 10:13 am

Aged 25 when I lost my job I remember I used to hang around my local park on my own sometimes for hours during the day.

My mom told me that people will think a grown man hanging out in a park by himself is inappropriate.

Do you think my mom made a comment about my behaviour at the time or not?



klanka
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20 Nov 2022, 1:18 pm

It probably does look peculiar. If you just hang around I can see it looking strange. If you went for a walk through the park or did some exercise it wouldnt look strange.



Jamesy
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20 Nov 2022, 3:55 pm

klanka wrote:
It probably does look peculiar. If you just hang around I can see it looking strange. If you went for a walk through the park or did some exercise it wouldnt look strange.




Why does it look weird to others?



klanka
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20 Nov 2022, 3:57 pm

What would you be doing? I suppose it looks strange someone hanging out by themselves with nothing to do. Maybe she is exaggerating it a bit.



hurtloam
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20 Nov 2022, 4:17 pm

Jamesy wrote:
klanka wrote:
It probably does look peculiar. If you just hang around I can see it looking strange. If you went for a walk through the park or did some exercise it wouldnt look strange.




Why does it look weird to others?


Was it a play park with swings and climbing frames where kids go to play? Could seem immature. The worst is that people mistake you for a nonce.



Jamesy
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20 Nov 2022, 5:33 pm

hurtloam wrote:
Jamesy wrote:
klanka wrote:
It probably does look peculiar. If you just hang around I can see it looking strange. If you went for a walk through the park or did some exercise it wouldnt look strange.




Why does it look weird to others?


Was it a play park with swings and climbing frames where kids go to play? Could seem immature. The worst is that people mistake you for a nonce.




Yeah nonce is what you can be mistaken for



kraftiekortie
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21 Nov 2022, 7:05 am

Getting a job would be much better for you.

Hanging alone in parks is not a good image. And it’s lonely.

If asked, maybe say you work the evening shift.



Senexx
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22 Nov 2022, 6:52 am

Without knowing the type of park, one cannot say.


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Jamesy
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22 Nov 2022, 8:59 am

When I was 24 i did used to loiter around near a childrens park play area on sundays at my local park.

Looking back on it that was an incredibly stupid thing to do even though i was going through depression at the time.



rse92
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23 Nov 2022, 2:51 pm

What is weird is hanging around in a park for hours when you should be looking for a job.



beady
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24 Nov 2022, 6:51 am

People who just hang out at parks by themselves creep me out. This would be especially true if they did this often.
I guess because it makes you wonder why -
Why they aren’t doing something like reading, walking a dog, meeting friends, actively working out, feeding the birds, drawing, or at least walking for exercise.

It’s the unknown that makes me worry. Most would find a person who is just standing or sitting there for extended periods of time to be odd.



shortfatbalduglyman
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25 Nov 2022, 6:52 pm

Senexx wrote:
Without knowing the type of park, one cannot say.


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Exactly

In some parks, adult males hang out all the time

Other parks are more children's play structures

When you say "hang out", what were you doing? Anyone might find anything creepy, but it is not illegal to "hang out" in the park for a couple of hours , (unless the sign says otherwise)

Did someone say you were bothering them?

Were you too loud?

What do you look like?



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27 Nov 2022, 10:20 am

It depends a lot on where in the park you hang out alone.

Next to a playground where there are children playing? Definitely not!

Next to an empty playground? A gray area; you can sit and rest briefly, but sitting all day is a no-no.

Next to a hiking/walking trail? Absolutely OK. (Although it looks better if you actually walk on the trail.)

Next to a pond with animals? Also OK. (It's the elderly who usaually do that, but you won't look bad, either.)

Next to a sports court where there are children playing? Not OK, but not as bad as the playground.

Next to a sports court where there are older teens or adults playing? Generally OK, as long as you don't stare.

Next to an empty sports court? Absolutely OK.



Jamesy
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27 Nov 2022, 10:25 am

Aspie1 wrote:
It depends a lot on where in the park you hang out alone.

Next to a playground where there are children playing? Definitely not!

Next to an empty playground? A gray area; you can sit and rest briefly, but sitting all day is a no-no.

Next to a hiking/walking trail? Absolutely OK. (Although it looks better if you actually walk on the trail.)

Next to a pond with animals? Also OK. (It's the elderly who usaually do that, but you won't look bad, either.)

Next to a sports court where there are children playing? Not OK, but not as bad as the playground.

Next to a sports court where there are older teens or adults playing? Generally OK, as long as you don't stare.

Next to an empty sports court? Absolutely OK.



When cycling I did used to park my bike next to a mostly empty children’s playground. Even that can look dodgy since there is a lot of paranoia about pedophiles etc….



Aspie1
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27 Nov 2022, 10:46 am

Jamesy wrote:
When cycling I did used to park my bike next to a mostly empty children’s playground. Even that can look dodgy since there is a lot of paranoia about pedophiles etc….
You said "mostly" empty playground, which means there were at least a few kids. If you're that concerned, don't stop in front of playgrounds at all. Or if you must, lightly squeeze the tires with your hands to make it look like you're checking for leaks, and leave in under 5 minutes.



Jamesy
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27 Nov 2022, 11:46 am

Aspie1 wrote:
Jamesy wrote:
When cycling I did used to park my bike next to a mostly empty children’s playground. Even that can look dodgy since there is a lot of paranoia about pedophiles etc….
You said "mostly" empty playground, which means there were at least a few kids. If you're that concerned, don't stop in front of playgrounds at all. Or if you must, lightly squeeze the tires with your hands to make it look like you're checking for leaks, and leave in under 5 minutes.



From others point of view could I have looked like I was up to no good?